Monday, July 24, 2017

#31 - Just Smile, Stupid




Note from artist: I realized after drawing this that it might seem like a subtle cry for help, but it's just a joke involving some ridiculous things I've heard in my life about depression. I'm feeling perfectly fine.

Isn't that right, voice-in-my-head-that-tells-me-to-burn-things?

Si, es correcto.
(he's Puerto Rican).


109 comments:

  1. While I get that some people have depression that goes beyond the whole "be thankful for what you've got" mantra, that works for me. Even on my worst day, there are a whole lot of people who have it a whole lot worse than me. I focus on that rather than the plethora of people who have it better than me.

    I got myself caught in the middle somewhere
    And that's just where I want to be

    -T. Rundgren

    To everyone else-get thee to a dispensary!

    Larry

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So my brand of depression, which is minor, is the kind that affects me physically. I don't feel sad. I don't feel suicidal. I mostly feel nothing, which isn't hard to deal with. It is hard, though, for me to concentrate, which makes work impossible. It's also hard for me to do physical activities, like working out, and I'm often very tired. Basically, my 8 cylinder brain is firing on 2 cylinders, which makes every task way harder than it normally is.

      Sadly, smiling and remembering it could be worse doesn't help that.

      I do often do that, though. Smile and remember it always could be worse. I mean, there's a dispensary just down the street! Some people have to drive 2-3 whole miles for that. I truly am a lucky individual.

      Delete
  2. Are you alright though? You're saying this isn't a cry for help, but that sounds like something someone crying for help might say. Do I need to call an ambulance? Do you want some hot coco?

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    1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIikqPmbgvI

      Delete
  3. My normal expression is rather neutral without a smile. I guess I must be depressed...

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    1. Oh yes, as someone who also has 'resting bitch face', I get that a lot, too. Yeah, I'm sorry I don't just walk around smiling from ear to ear like I've got massive brain damage.

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    2. I do, rather maniacally. It keeps people away.

      Delete
  4. I suspect that most people don't understand the difference between being sad and being depressed.

    Although, to be honest, if that blond guy can have only three teeth and still keep smiling, it seems like the rest of us should be able to smile, too.

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    1. Actually, he has 4 teeth. He's got a really big molar in back that he's quite proud of. Now he's got a case of "the sads" because you insulted his teeth. :(

      Delete
  5. It's difficult for people who have never been clinically depressed to understand exactly what it involves. All I do know is offering advice that might work for a person who just gets moody sometimes isn't even remotely helpful to a person who has full-on clinical depression. I just hope someday there can be more awareness and understanding, because this is something a lot of people struggle with, and they could use some real support.

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    1. I think a lack of understanding is a big part of it. I also think most people mean well when they try to offer this kind of advice, because 'hey, smile and feel better!' works for people who are just down in the dumps. But telling someone with depression to smile and feel better is kind of like telling a paraplegic to just walk it off.

      Delete
  6. You know what they say, "A smile a day keeps depression at bay... You feeling a little sad, well that's okay... Because the night is never longer than the day. But you broke and yo therapist asking for pay. And that empty wallet o' yo's won't KEEP THEM COPPERS AWAY. AND THEY LOCK A MAN UP TO KEEP HIM FROM GOIN' ASTRAY. DEPRESSED HE CAN'T SEE HIS DAUGHTER 'TIL MAY..." or something like that.

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    1. The only thing you forgot to do was drop the mic, you rap battle master.

      [im]http://i.imgur.com/ZS5J9BM.gif[/im]

      Delete
  7. I've suffered with depression since I was 9 years old. It's not something that just goes away because you want it to or because you smile more. I actually had a psychiatrist tell me to fake smile more and eventually I might actually feel more like what I'm projecting outward. Yeah sure, that'll work. People who haven't had to deal with depression for years and years just don't understand at all.

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    1. I've heard the fake smile thing, too. Like it's supposed to trick your body into being happy. I'm sad to say my body is too smart for that, and it's now just made me sadder and angrier for insulting its intelligence. Great job, doc.

      Delete
  8. Show me someone who isn't bummed out 65-70% of their waking hours and I'll show you someone who either has no clue what's going on in "this world" or who has a severe lack of empathy.

    ~ D-FensDogG
    (link:] Ferret-Faced Fascist Friends

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    1. I'm highly suspect of anyone who can walk through life like Bob the Enzyte Guy™.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cR5fYm4Pcdc

      That guy? Sure, his dick doesn't work, but the bigger issue is that he has severed heads in his basement freezer.

      Delete
    2. I wrote that some people have a lack of empathy. But how can one "have" a "lack" when the word "lack" means to "NOT have"?

      These are the sorts of mysteries that lead me to drink.

      ~ D-FensDogG
      (link:] Ferret-Faced Fascist Friends

      Delete
    3. Oxymorons make me drink, too. Like when someone tells me I'm seriously funny. Well, which is it?

      Am I going to drink tonight? It's a definite possibility.

      Delete
    4. Lack of empathy. That's me.

      Actually, I used to work dispatch for a sheriff's department. I received the 911 calls that came through. I dealt with death, rape, violence, sexual assault, child abuse, kidnapping, homicide and tons of stuff you can't even imagine people would do to each other on a daily basis.

      I quickly found a switch in my head that I could turn off so that my job wouldn't force me into a downward spiral of suicidal depression. I separated myself from the horrible people and situations I had to deal with. It made life much easier. However, I had trouble flipping the switch back on again when I went home.

      I haven't worked there in years and I find that the switch now seems to be on auto-pilot. I am crazy happy all the time and if something happens to challenge that, the switch goes off to emotionally remove myself from it. I can see the situation right in front of me. I even recognize it for the terrible thing that it is, but I have no emotional connection. It's just gone. Any compassion that I show is an act because I know how I am supposed to behave even if I don't feel it.

      My empathy circuits are fried.

      Delete
    5. Hmmm, I'm confused... am I supposed to empathize with this comment?

      (BTW, I don't know how you did that. I already have zero faith in humanity. If I had to work dispatch, I'd probably go all Falling Down on the assholes I encountered)

      Delete
    6. As dispatcher, I had all their info. I knew the address of these horrible people. I knew where they were. I knew the locations of sex dens, drugs deals, child molesters, etc. It would be very easy to just drive over after work and shoot someone if I wanted to.

      Delete
    7. There's a TV show idea in there somewhere. Like Dexter, only not terrible after a few seasons.

      Delete
  9. Applause for this message and the fabulously expressive artwork. I could write a dissertation here. In fact, I started one, and -lucky you- it decided to disappear. I'll just say that the world's #1 mental health problem is depression. The real oddballs are the ones who deny getting depressed.

    Have a good, productive week.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And the world's #2 mental health problem is talking about Fight Club.

      I might have my rules mixed up. And you're right, no need to preach to the choir. :)

      Delete
  10. I'm too tired to be depressed.
    Now leave me alone.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. I'm still not getting off your lawn, though.

      Delete
  11. Our youngest is suffering from depression right now, and finally feeling pretty decent after six months of meds and about a year of counseling. She's back to being herself again (she was pretty bad for a while), and the goal is to eventually wean her from the meds since hers was a semi-sudden situational type of depression, but we joke with her about all the dumb things people say to those who suffer from whatever type of depression they have. She takes it well because she knows we're not ignorant boobs saying it in all sincerity.

    My favorite comeback, though, was a couple months ago when she asked her older brother to cut the pizza she'd made because she's awful at cutting even slices. She said, "I'm terrible at cutting things," and he was like, "Wow, and you call yourself depressed! Come on! I think you're faking it."

    I like Harry Hamid's comment above: that blond guy with the cheek pouches and the chin shaped like I don't know what—if he can smile, then I can, too.

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    1. That's awesome. That reminds me of that old joke: "I wish my lawn was depressed so it would cut itself."

      I'm like your youngest. I was lucky enough that 6 months of meds led me to feeling better, so now I just take measures to make sure I don't 'revert'. For example, if I had bulldog cheeks and 4 teeth, I would absolutely revert.

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  12. Bah, just shrug it off. See? It's right there, that little block on your shoulder. It doesn't have good balance, shrug and it's gone. Now give us a smile. Isn't that better? Now go enjoy life because you are normal. Don't forget to be grateful that you aren't the guy on the street corner in the dead of winter with an empty tin can and a sign that reads "the end is nye" who also can't spell and has rotting teeth and bad body odor and is drunk most of the time with a case of worms, fleas and maybe hypothermia, not to be confused with an empty thermos. Also be grateful you didn't write that run on sentence. Aren't you happy yet? Damn, I'm depressed now too.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Gee, thanks, now I'm feeling even MORE depressed because I can't stop thinking about that poor homeless guy with the rotting teeth who smells like piss, probably from all of the piss he drinks to sustain himself. I think this is the exact opposite of help.

      Delete
  13. I try and smile at people when I am out and about. Sometimes they respond. Not often. It does help all round so there. How come you only comment on my blog the day you guys write one yourselves?

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    1. I always appreciate when someone smiles at me. Especially since I live in a community where most people just look away and don't even want to make eye contact.

      And sorry about the lack of comments. It's been a crazy past couple of months for both of us. It should settle down soon. I can't always comment, but I do read. Tomorrow, in fact, I'm going to try out that low country boil you posted recently. Never tried one with green beans in it.

      Delete
  14. Gee, neither the shrink nor the pusher M.D. ever told me to try that. It HAS to work better than anything they did. Smile and be grateful. Yeah, that should work. At least the days are long and sunny and that helps and all the comments here definitely help. Aren't we all just trying to be a healthier form of mental disorder?

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    1. "The sun is shining! The birds are singing! Shouldn't you be happy?"
      The sun melts my flesh. Those birds are just telling me to fuck off so I don't invade their nest. Remind me how this helps?

      Delete
    2. You're pretty good at this.

      Delete
  15. I can't stand being told to smile. My response is always, I am smiling. Fuck you, world.

    Love,
    Janie

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    1. "Oh, I'll give you something to be sad about!" - Mexican grandmother, about to beat me with a flip flop

      Delete
    2. My mother used yard sticks and fly swatters. When one of my older sisters moved out, we found about a dozen fly swatters hidden in her closet.

      Delete
    3. I'm kinda hoping she didn't use fly swatters that had already been used to swat flies...

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    4. Oh, yes they were used on flies. She didn't give any pests a break.

      Delete
  16. Replies
    1. Depression hinders most people's creativity, but apparently it only fuels mine. Go figure.

      Delete
  17. Just read an article yesterday about how writers feel more depression than others because we overuse the creativity center in our brain or something. It depressed me because I'm obviously not being creative enough to overuse any part of my brain and become depressed. Wait. Egg-chicken? Chicken-egg?

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Just keep depressing yourself until you feel a creative boost. I'm pretty sure that's how it works.

      Delete
  18. Keep smiling, it solves all problems--or maybe it's bacon I'm thinking of.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. See, if someone offered me bacon, I'd definitely be inclined to change my position on this topic.

      Delete
  19. If only just smiling made depression vanish things would be better

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    1. Why not throw in weight loss and thicker hair? "Smile your way to a better you!"

      Delete
  20. Don't know what exactly to say here. Except perhaps to bring up the worst I ever felt towards my Dad was when his way of stopping my crying was, ""Ooh, look at the birdies dancing" sing-song. I would wish my foot was big enough to fit the boot I imagined going up his ass.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. You:
      [im]https://i.redditmedia.com/7zvjGY_l1wlpeAh5KGdL2CGr0iv0nU_TwR-EOHYr-Cw.jpg?w=320&s=bfc31718fc37a16d46c314360524c1bf[/im]

      Delete
    2. According to Google, no. If you're looking to open a niche business for angry clowns, though, there COULD be a small, untapped market...

      Delete
  21. I WISH just smiling would help my depression. Smiling is said to make you happier. And, sure, when I'm depressed, it does feel nice to smile or laugh when something warrants it, but it doesn't get rid of it.

    Thanks for this one! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fake it till you make it: works with actors and musicians, but sadly, not with depression.

      Delete
  22. Yep, telling a depressed person to smile makes as much sense as telling someone with a broken leg to just walk it off.

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    1. NFL football player: I don't see the issue here.

      Delete
  23. I am one of those naturally happy people. Have been my entire life, so I have no understanding of depression. I was one of those people who would hand out meaningless, insulting (although well-intentioned) advice to try smiling. Find a hobby. Get over it.

    Depression and mental illness have really been pushed more into the public spotlight in the last few years and I now realize how wrong I was. I still can't relate, but I try not to be stupid anymore.

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    1. I've never heard find a hobby. That's a new one. I have a ton of hobbies, though, so I can confirm that that doesn't work. Well, maybe it works. One of my favorite hobbies is not being depressed.

      Delete
  24. B&B:
    I think I could write a book on depression...and how to give it a good kick it it's nuts...heh
    Thankfully, I'm still around to tell whatever tale need to be told...if ever anyone asks.
    I will say that it doesn't involve the use of pharmaceuticals or alcohol.
    We just all have to be ready whenever life tosses crap ta us and we're short a few fans, if you get my drift.
    A little faith goes a long way.

    Good post and great comments.

    Stay safe (with a classy smile) out there, guys.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Wait, you mean I shouldn't drink a depressant like beer when I'm depressed?

      Keep fighting the good fight, Bob. Sometimes being ready is half the battle.

      Delete
  25. Smiling never helps. Sometimes chocolate helps me, and reading and binge watching and sleeping and writing. Yes, writing is the only reason I function "normally."

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    1. Writing is pretty much the only way I can channel my depressive weirdness. Without it I'm just... well, a depressed weirdo.

      Delete
  26. Let a frown be your umbrella because it's shaped like one unlike a smile

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    1. They say it takes more muscles to frown than to smile... Which is great, because my mouth is buff as hell. I can curl a whole buckets of cheese curls.

      Delete
  27. In my day, they just locked us in the fruit cellar until we snapped out of it.

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    1. I don't have a cellar. Nor do I have any fruit. Maybe that's why I'm so susceptible to depression. And also scurvy.

      Delete
    2. Aaarrrggghhhh!... You scurvy dog, walk the plank, hoist the mainsail, and drop anchor in the Bay Of Beer. Do it in THAT order, you bilge rat!

      The following -- in conjunction with a fifth of "demon rum" -- should put a smile on your face, thus curing your malady:

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i674e6f47R0

      ~ Captain Hy Seeze

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    3. See, now if someone just offered me Cheech and Chong when I was experiencing depression, that might change things.

      "Hey man, did you get a crowbar?"
      "Uh, no, but I got a crispy crunch, and I got a mocha delight."

      BTW, is it just me, or do Cheech and Chong sound like they drive a monster truck?

      Delete
  28. Yep, I've dealt with that crap. I don't even have depression and it bugs the crap out of me. I can't imagine how annoying it must be for actual sufferers.

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    1. Oh, it takes a lot to get me butthurt. Most of the people saying these things mean well but just don't understand depression. About the only thing that will actually annoy me is if that same person goes on to tell me that they believe that depression is just made up and it's not a real ailment and basically saying I'm making up some kind of illness just for attention.

      Which is kind of funny, because when I'm depressed, I actually withdraw from others, meaning I don't WANT attention.

      Delete
  29. *sigh* I fucking despise that shit. I won't go into the finer details, but I'll say I have a deep resentment for people who don't seem to understand the PROBLEM with this kind of recommendation.

    That said, if you ever need someone, hit me up. Door's always open to talk.

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    Replies
    1. I appreciate it, man. Really do. The ignorance is astounding. I once went to a doctor who declared within 5 minutes of seeing me that there was nothing wrong with me, and I was probably just faking it because it was a big 'fad' now, but she'd happily prescribe me some generic meds so that I'd go away.

      I never went back. What a bitch, right?

      Delete
  30. Well all it takes generally is a night of hot, steamy to bring a smile on my face... Oh the heaving and face massage always helps... the quiet ones hehe. Talking is so over rated especially ehrm theres so many mountainous regions to explore.

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    1. A hot, steamy... shower? Yeah, I guess I enjoy those too. Not as much as you, but it's nice.

      Delete
  31. As you know, my youngest is dealing with this right now. You also know we are a family with a healthy sense of humor so I can appreciate all jokes about the topic and still have the ability to understand just how serious depression is and that it needs to be addressed and not to be told to smile, or just get over it. I cannot tell you how many times my child was told, "just don't think about the stuff that's making you sad." Um, yeah, it doesn't work that way.

    On a way lighter note:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Fo-Jckl_MU

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    Replies
    1. See, maybe that's just my sick sense of humor, but if I told someone I was depressed and they asked me if I needed a wambulance, and then started doing the 'waa waa waa' sound, I'd probably be forced to burst out laughing.

      Delete
    2. And that is why you and I get along so well. We have the same sense of humor!

      Delete
  32. Haha! Yeah. I totally hate when somebody tells me to smile when I really, really, really don't want to!

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    1. I wonder if there's anything that can make a person want to smile less than being told they need to smile?

      Delete
  33. How about those people that like to throw in a little trivia and tell you that smiling requires less muscles than frowning? You can always tell them, "Glaring at you is worth the extra effort."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sit back and watch while I flex all of my mouth muscles. What comes out may sound like 'fuck you', but that's necessary air expulsion in order to flex all of those bulging frown muscles.

      Delete
  34. Yes that does happen where people who have no clue assume things for and about you. Good to know that you are good though, my form is similar-very minor but when it's there it's there and there can be a slight shift in perspective as to how the world looks at that point in time.

    But we do what we have to do, and keep on striving and living for today and tomorrow, no? Warm greetings and best wishes!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My slight shift in perspective is going from "Most people suck" to "Everybody sucks." What can I say? I need my optimism to be happy.

      Cheers to being one of those few people that don't suck, Mr. Blogoratti.

      Delete
    2. Why thank you kind sir, and yes cheers to that indeed.

      Delete
  35. That really hits home. I've suffered from depression since 2012 and get fed up of people asking me why I'm unhappy, I'm not - it's an emptiness that's hard to explain to anyone who's never experienced it.

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    1. Funny how we have so many words in the English language, and yet when it comes to depression, people can only throw around words like 'sad' and 'unhappy'. It's no wonder people don't really understand it.

      Delete
  36. People who get on my nerves always rave about my beautiful teeth, so I smile a lot. Hugs...

    ReplyDelete
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    1. At least you have a smile worth asking for.

      "Come on, beautiful, give me a smile!"
      [im]http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-835HrfauBP0/TgtUvU8tvaI/AAAAAAAAAm8/yXCjMdbxadQ/s1600/UglyDate5.png[/im]

      Delete
  37. Having lived most of my life with clinical depression, this is one of my pet peeves. Another one is, "A positive attitude is all it takes." Well, shit! Why didn't I think of that?!? By the way, I smile all the time. My father said it was gas! Aw, crap, now you've got me started.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm absolutely positive that I can't beat my depression just by faking a smile!

      How's that?

      Delete
  38. I totally appreciate that you are just joking around a bit but that really does annoy me when people tell other people to smile or pull the "your as happy as you choose to be" into the conversation. Sadly this comment sounds like I should be smiling more.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Yeah, right? Well, my brain "chooses" to shrink my hippocampus and slow neuron transmission and reduce serotonin levels, so what do I "choose" for myself when that happens?

      Delete
  39. It's as useful as telling someone who's upset to "just calm down" - REVERSE effect.

    Fortunately for me, I'm good at hiding it. People generally don't even know I'm depressed. They just think I'm busy, or deeply focused on the task at hand.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, but that's still not as bad as telling an angry woman "You're just on your period."

      Delete
  40. The voices in my head can't seem to decide if I should burn things or not. And another part of me feels I should be concerned about the multiple voices in my head.

    As someone who has suffered from depression for a long time, not much pisses me off more than people who tell me to just smile more. I'd rant about it but I'd just make myself angry. Simply said; fuck those people.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. I asked the voices in my head if I should be concerned that there are voices in my head, and they said nah, we're completely normal. Good enough for me!

      Delete
  41. I can't stand people who think it's that easy to "get over" any kind of mental illness.
    Only makes dealing with it worse, honestly.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's pretty much a kick in the metaphorical dick. A way of saying, "Well, I guess if you weren't such a pussy you'd just be happy and cheery like everyone else."

      (Fun fact: most 'normal' people aren't bubbly, either)

      Delete
  42. When people say, "Smile! what they're really saying is, 'I can't deal with you, your sadness make me feel uncomfortable.'

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    1. Which is funny, because when I'm depressed, I don't want to deal with them either, but I'll gladly smile if it makes them go away.

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    2. Good point. I'll remember that next time I bump into a bunch of normal people. Do you reckon THIS'll do?

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    3. Ha!

      [im]https://media.giphy.com/media/gFwZfXIqD0eNW/giphy.gif[/im]

      Delete
  43. Yes. It's so easy to judge when people haven't experiences the crazy swing of hormones/brain chemistry that overwhelms even the sane thoughts in our heads. I have actually heard rumors (and experienced some of the realities), that the American diet is a huge proponent of depression. True to life, when I cut out refined sugars (and get enough sunshine), I do feel significantly better. But I've also been through bouts of explainable depression where these things might have made a bump of difference, but it never would have been a cure. Here's to all those dealing with this, and the battles ahead!

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    Replies
    1. Absolutely. Cutting out all processed foods (especially sugar) has been huge for my mood. It's called junk food for a reason. It's junk for your body and for your mind.

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  44. This made me laugh haha. I suffered from an eating disorder as a teenager, and too many people have told me to "stop being so dramatic and just eat", when I couldn't. People just don't understand that's not how it works

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You: Doctor, what's wrong with me?
      Doctor: You're just being dramatic. Stop being a little baby. That'll be $100, please.

      Delete