I think it was American Idol that first introduced to the masses the idea that just because you love doing something, it doesn't mean you have any right doing it as a career.
Or unless your dream is to be the biggest jerk. We'd all like you to pass on that one. Unless that dream includes being a big jerk to a den full of lions, then we are all for it.
"My dream is to be an unbearable asshole on the Internet to everyone who disagrees with me." - everyone on Facebook right now, apparentlyDream big!
What age is the right age to give up dreams of rock stardom?What age is too old to finally accept that I'm never going to ask out that one woman.You know which one I mean. The one locked in the shed? I have it all planned out, but I'm afraid to just go do it.
"I mean, I know she got married 3 years ago, but I feel like if I just finally summed up the courage and asked her out that she might say yes."
And I thought I was the only one with these kind of thoughts.
I like how you drew the big Atlas men who have no, um, junk but you seem to fill out the green bathing suit well. Yes, my eyes went there. Every man would love to have some green vixen with 3 boobs. The green ladies all started with Star Trek..but not the boob thing
Well, with all of the steroid use that those guys put their bodies through, you have to assume at this point that they're packing next to nothing down there. Meanwhile, Brandon got up in front of everyone with his skinny, pasty ass and still showed off like he owned the place. The balls that takes!
B&B:Aw, cripes, this is SO damn funny...and so very TRUE at the same time.("Dictatertots"...LMAO)A very nice (and humorous) tribute to your frind.If you never follow your dreams, you will never know where or how far you could have gone.(isn't there an ELVIS song in there somewhere?)Good post.Stay safe (and dream-filled) out there, guys.
Well, we don't need things like "talent" or "music" when we have a killer band name like The Dictatertots. That Top 40 hit is as good as ours!
Sounds like my band, "Innurendo". Three-breasted space ladies might also have three legs. How do you deal with that?
Well, that depends, if she has three legs does that mean she has two vaginas? Or if she smooth like a Ken Doll between one pair of legs? And why did I reference a Ken Doll instead of a Barbie Doll, since both are smooth down there?
My dream is to be 50 years old, have pink, spiky hair, and frequent nightclubs where people only know me by my alias, Big Courtney. I've got the aging part down, but I'll work on the other parts when the time comes.
Only if you wear oversized Hawaiian t-shirts that let the ladies know you're "DTF" and you still spike your hair, despite having very little up top.
Space cowboys will always attract the women, wasn't that what Hans Solo was, and the Wookie too? Some women like the idea of a little danger. A person should realize that just because we can dream or visualize what we would like, the odds of that coming true are miniscule. . .I dreamed of being taller, but hasn't happened so far, and neither did that dream about winning the lottery. Maybe there's some special technique I don't know about (and no, I don't want to try the 'rack'. . .even if it does stretch the body really well)
Mind... blown. I guess Han Solo was a space cowboy. And here I thought I was being original(ly stupid).And maybe you're going about it all wrong. In the era of photoshop and movie magic, anyone can be tall if they want to. Just ask Tom Cruise.[im]http://joemonster.org/i/f/cruise_tall01.jpg[/im]
There were space cowboys even before there was a Hans Solo. And tell them that you heard it here first on Roller Derby:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eb1TIGvvWWE~ D-FensDogGCheck out my new blog @(Link:] Stephen T. McCarthy Reviews...
I have always followed... the scent of hops and malt... which fulfilled my dreams... of finding the best beers.Q: So is it safe to assume then that Brandon eats with drum sticks which he mistakenly thinks are macho-man chopsticks?~ D-FensDogGCheck out my new blog @(Link:] Stephen T. McCarthy Reviews...
I think we just solved the mystery of why Brandon's so skinny."I always thought it was way too damn hard to get food in my mouth."[im]https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/7d/5f/3c/7d5f3cffcc5fb50b87925693850a8457.jpg[/im]
I never dreamed of being anything weird. Although I guess that depends on what you consider weird. When I was 18 I got a job at the morgue as a pick up person. (The people that go and pick up the dead bodies) but you had to be able to lift 100lbs by yourself and after a month even after working out at the gym I just wasn't strong enough and they let me go. Told me to come back when I got stronger. lol
I hope that was followed by an 80s style training montage (running in 2 feet of snow, punching a slab of meat, lifting a small cow) and then you marching back into that morgue to get your got-damn job back.
LOl That would have been awesome, but no. I ended up getting a job in a bakery instead.
I can see Jacqueline giggling (which develops quickly into uproarious laughter) in response, Bryan. Perfect tribute. Thank you.
Thanks, Robyn! She had the greatest sense of humor (which is probably really biased of me to say).
I guess the rest of us will have to live vicariously through Captain Kirk.[im]http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g139/Cryostar/Enterprise-4x17-Bound008.jpg[/im]
I love how in the Star Trek world, alien women are always sexy. Like, they still have long hair, and big boobs, and curvy hips, they're just dyed green and maybe have horns or antennas.Meanwhile, in real life, the female version of an alien probably looks more like this. Not very sexable.[im]http://www.telegraph.co.uk/content/dam/on-demand/2016/08/01/stranger-things-monster-1_2-small_trans_NvBQzQNjv4BqCca9BU0TuyHkZJzHTSJqzg57EFzlVrO-V_kNyX87nOk.jpg[/im]
I always thought I'd be in a rock band, or a writer of some type. Now my job involves singing all the time in a band with a bunch of killer-quality musicians and having a blast at it. Editing and blogging is as good (to me) as writing right now, so I got the stuff of my dreams in a completely different way than I could have imagined. Still, there was always that dream of being a martial arts champion that was never realized, due to my extreme laziness and reluctance to push myself . . . Gaaahhhh, I'm such a loser.
It's never too late. Look at Steven Seagal. He probably can't even get up off of his couch without getting winded, but somehow people believed for years that he was a martial arts badass.
Or unless it involves jazz...
Especially if it's that really weird jazz that's meant to sound like someone playing an instrument for the very first time.Did they make a mistake? Are they just idiots hammering random notes? Or was it meant to sound like that, and they're avant garde geniuses?
I'm still holding out on that NBA contract.
Now that Kobe's out of the game, there's really nothing holding you back.
So my dream of getting super powers isn't a good one? I shouldn't fall in a vat of acid or get bit by bugs or expose myself to radiation? Got it!
Well, you're welcome to do any of those things, but I have a feeling your only superpower will be getting a visit from your favorite celebrity through the Make a Wish foundation.
How do you even make distorted music notes on *drums*? That's more skill than incompetence, I'd say.The timing of this comic is hilarious though. I just got a decent paying office job (in software, but we work on open office floors, so eh), but maybe I want to go chase a dream instead. I'm good at it and it's physically possible, I just don't know how stupid it is. In a way it has to do with martians, and it's this idealistic "this is so much fun to do *and* it can change the world" kind of thing, so ehhh.
Brandon didn't even bother tuning his drums before playing them! Can you imagine that? What a novice!If there's any way possible that you can keep the office job and chase that dream at the same time - do it! I see my job only as a means to support the path to my dream, not as my career (I shudder at the very word).
But what if my dream is... another job? I wish I was kidding, but I also don't. Doing your dream for a living seems amazing, but it's all so... wild. Not exactly the kind of thing most people would do, quit their steady job to work for some shaky startup without any care other than "as long as I survive". idk, just venting here at this point.
FWIW, I have a few friends who started/worked in start ups, and while they aren't rich by any means, they are doing what they love full time.
Jacqueline would have got a kick out of this one, boys!
Thanks! We think so, too!
People call me a Space Cowboy.Ok, not really.But ... But ... They could if they wanted to!I wish they would.:'(
People call me the gangster of love. I forced them to do it. It doesn't feel sincere. :(
I never really had a dream about what I wanted to be. I just wonder around and hope for the best.
Going through life carefree and hopeful... Some might say that's living the dream.
Jacqueline wouldn't have found any of these dreams stupid. But she WOULD be laughing her head off.
Also, she was way more likely to be a rock star, a bodybuilder, and a space cowboy, all at once. What couldn't she do?
RIP Jacqueline.On the dream following front, what if my dream is to make a living selling my jarred farts? Does that fall under the category of "stupid?"
It's only stupid if you don't make money. Just ask the guy who thought up the genius idea of charging $50 to name a star after someone and somehow claim that that star belongs to them.
Only if I can get and keep a red stapler...
...And I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it's not okay because if they take my stapler then I'll set the building on fire.
Methinks it's time for me to forget about taking tap dancing lessons. :)This was a funny post, and a terrific tribute to your friend.
It's never too late to be the next Shirley Temple. Not a tap star, just someone who's dead. Too much?
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Now I'm going to have to quit my job as space cowboy
Personally, I think moon rancher has always been your calling, whether you can admit it or not.
A very nice tribute... no more need be said.
Thank you, good sir.
Dream small, and all of your dreams will come true.
"...And in conclusion, it only took me three and a half years, but I finally got that 2% cost of living raise, so never give up on chasing your dreams because miracles happen every..." *choking back tears* "Single... day."
My dream is to actually get a good night of sleep. I say, as I lay in bed, and refuse to go to sleep at a decent hour because I'm too busy being "busy" with texts and awful apps.
I know that feel all too well.[im]https://pics.onsizzle.com/11pm-okay-one-more-youtube-video-then-im-going-to-14494821.png[/im]
Are you saying I should or shouldn't give up on my dream of marrying Johnny Depp circa 1993?
I'm thinking you might want to downgrade to current burned out, dead tooth Johnny Depp.[im]https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-YpNx_IsDc0Y/VrhAZRw49MI/AAAAAAAIQzQ/J2e0bNR61TU/s1600/JOhnny-MAIN.jpg[/im]
I laughed, and then I was sad when I saw this was a post dedicated to a wonderful dreamer who lost their life. I think that, as writers, we're privileged in that we can dream all we want. We just create worlds in which those dreams are possible, and people who live them for us. I can't be a space cowboy myself, but Trent can. I can't be a pirate, but Caspian can. Or he could, if I ever got around to writing that book. I'm worse than George R.R Martin. At least he has the excuse of working on a major hit show with HBO.
I don't feel sorry for George R.R. Martin. His only job is to write.That 10 minutes you spent vacuuming? 20 minutes preparing breakfast? An hour spent grocery shopping? He can pay someone to do that.The difference is that you don't have endless time to write, and he does. He's definitely worse.
I don't care how stupid it sounds, I'm am going to bang the girl with the three breasts from Total Recall.
Never abandon your dreams, my friend. There's always a happy (trashy) alternative.[im]http://akns-images.eonline.com/eol_images/Entire_Site/2014822/rs_600x600-140922141757-600.3boobs.cm.92214.jpg[/im]Girl Pays $20,000 to Get 3 Boobs So She'll Become Famous
Hm, missed this blog. You have to have a dream in the first place to follow it. I did as a young woman, I wanted to go on the stage, my parents assured me I wasn't good enough and squashed that dream flat. So then I dreamed of getting married and I did that twice (yeah I got divorced in between). Guess I was never that ambitious.
Wow. I've always wondered if I'd still be as passionate about writing if my parents hadn't been so supportive. I too realized my dream of getting married, but as much fun as that was, I don't think I'm shooting for a second. It's either this or being a cat lady. Nothing else.
Your the second person to mention this lady. So sad I missed her. Loving the toons guys!
Thanks! Jacqueline was sure something else. There are so many great blog folks out there (yourself included). It's hard to keep track of them all. It's like Pokemon, only cool people instead of little monsters you make fight to the death.
Sad for her.
She had a happy life, at least.
I had fun reading all of the comments.I almost missed the tribute at the bottom. I'm sure she would've loved this.
We had fun reading them, too. Makes drawing these stupid little comics all worth it.
I didn't have the pleasure of knowing her but this was a classy tribute! Nice job.
Us? Classy? Never! Thanks, though. :)
Very sad and very nice tribute...
It's not sad once you realize that somehow Brandon took 2nd place in that Mr. Universe competition (it's all politics, really).
I'm sorry for your loss, Bryan. You did a great tribute for her here. A wonderful reminder that life is too short and we need to live each day to it's fullest.
Yes, we absolutely do.-switches over to YouTube tab to watch videos of people arguing over essentially nothingWHY DO I STILL DO THIS TO MYSELF
I'm sorry for your loss, this is a great tribute :)To be honest my dream is to have a decent amount of sleep, but I'll probably stay up all night again tonight to play Battlefield 1, because that's basically how pathetic I am
Pathetic? I love all night video game sessions, and don't get to do that nearly enough. You, my friend, are living the dream!
Way too many people want to be space cowboys. When everyone knows the dream is to walk through the Stargate and step out onto another world. Duh!If you've ever watched Tangled, you know you get to pick new dreams. As you age, dreams change. Right now, I'm dreaming of having a housekeeper. And a cook. And a lawn guy.
Ooh, can I steal your dream? I'm sitting in a very dirty room, hungry, with an uncut lawn, thinking I need someone else to take care of all of this for me. Adulting is hard.
Not having the talent that is linked to your dream is a total buzz kill but seemingly there are a lot of people out there that value persistence over talent. For example, I always find it amazing on shows like American Idol that people think they have a beautiful singing voice but in actuality sound like nails across a chalk board. Luckily for me, my dream of being a critical bitch seems to work out as I do seem to have a natural gift for it. OR maybe there hasn't been a contest that seeks to exemplify bitches and would allow people to buzz me off the stage. Of course, if there are gifted bitches out there with 3 boobs, it wouldn't be a fair contest, anyway. Who can really compete with that.
My dream is to one day even be half the critical bitch you are. It's an admirable quality. Way more admirable than some dumb attention whore with 3 boobs. Newsflash - guys only have 2 hands. The extra boob is just wasted flesh. Like her.~Critical bitch in training
My dream is to one day be independently wealthy and have a dog/cat sanctuary. I originally thought a rescue, but I am afraid I'll adopt them out to losers. So I have the dog/cat sanctuary down. Now to be wealthy.
I like the way you think. Why waste all the time and energy to find new (and potentially bad) homes when you can just have a giant farm full of very happy cats and dogs? I see no loss there.
Oh man, I just saw that this was a tribute and now I'm sad. :(I'm sure she'd appreciate this post :)
This was meant to be a happy post, so no need to feel sad. There's still a lot of life left to live!**assuming I'm not hit by a bus tomorrow, which would be weird, since I'm not expecting to leave the house
I have been saying for decades that..."My dream is to become so wealthythat I can afford to get drunkin an airport bar."At this point, I doubt I'll ever really have THAT kind of money.~ D-FensDogG
I had a drink in an airport bar once.I'm still paying it off in monthly installments.
Haha! Yeah, I guess we all need a dose of reality.
Well, not those of us who are actually good at what we do. Right....RIGHT?
RIP Jacqueline. I'm absolutely speechless, fellas.
My only hope is that this post is something she would have been proud of. I can't imagine her wanting us to all be sad over her.
I saw at least one comment above about Han Solo and space cowboys. Did you not watch Firefly/Serenity??? I take your Han Solo and raise you a Malcolm Reynolds. I'm afraid if you're thinking of space cowboy as a potential career change, the competition is pretty darn stiff. ::so not a ridiculous career option:: #spacecowboysrockhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=315tYkYxT1k
Ummm... so... I've never seen Firefly. Or Serenity. There, I said it.
I've been pretty fortunate in my life to have been able to follow dreams because of one lucky break or another. Then there were dreams that I started to follow and then found out that they were either too sucky to stay with or I didn't have what it took (usually money).But your advice is smart advice. Reality is the most practical way to go most of the time. Dreams don't always pay the bills.Arlee BirdTossing It Out
One time at a writer's conference we met a young woman who had gotten her first royalty check. Everyone else was excited for her, but she was sad, because it "couldn't even pay the power bill." Like, she didn't care that she sold 90 books and signed 4 of those copies and made some fans/some new friends, she was hung up over the fact that she only made $90.It still confounds me in this day and age that when you make something like $1 per book that people still expect this to be the type of profession to go into if you want to pay the bills. Look, even if you sell 10,000 books a year (which can actually get you bestseller status on certain lists, depending on the month) you're only making $10,000 a year. As a bestselling author. Who can live off of that?The fact is, she wasn't writing for the right reason. And sure enough, after that book, she never wrote again. That was 8 years ago.