Thursday, July 14, 2016

The Post About GUNS!

The two of us agree on almost everything when it comes to topics that truly matter. Which is better - Pepsi or Coke. Paper vs plastic. Which way the toilet paper goes. But one thing we don't agree on at all is guns. When it comes to guns, we have two completely polar opposite views that neither of us will budge on, so today we wanted to see if you the reader could help us decide who's right and who's wrong.

First up, Bryan's belief.

Bryan believes that under no circumstances should anyone ever own a gun. Ever. Mostly, this is because he believes that guns don't serve any purpose whatsoever.



He also believes that if you should ever need to defend yourself in a rare life and death situation, that you can absolutely do it without a gun.



And to the people that already have guns, he believes they should be turned in to the government. That Obama should keep his promise of taking away all of our guns.


And ultimately, Bryan believes that the US can live peacefully with all guns banned, and he has complete faith that the government can not only confiscate and destroy all 300 million of them, but keep those guns out of the hands of criminals through strict laws, because if there's one thing criminals respect, it's the law.

This, however, is a stark contrast to what Brandon believes.

Brandon believes that everyone should carry a gun. EVERYONE. Even people who don't want a gun should be given a gun as a means of protecting themselves.



He believes everyone should carry it at all times, on their hip, in a holster. Because after all, this is the old West, and you never know when you might need your gun. At a mall? Maybe! At a playground? Possibly! At grandma's funeral? Might as well err on the side of caution! Danger lurks everywhere, and it's better to be over-prepared than under-prepared!


Brandon also believes that guns should be put in every classroom, as a way of preventing school shootings. If teacher's packing heat, after all, then no one's going to try to pull any fast ones in our nation's classrooms.



And ultimately, Brandon believes that if every single person has a gun, then criminals and would-be terrorists don't stand a chance. Neither do victims of miscommunication or innocent bystanders hit by the rapid fire of someone who has no firearms training whatsoever and vision like Mr. Magoo, but sometimes, just sometimes, don't you have to put everyone around you in mortal danger just to keep everyone around you safe?

So there you have it, folks, our views on gun ownership. Clearly one of us is right and one of us is wrong, so let's have it. Be brutally honest. Which of us is right?

Cheers and stay armed to the teeth (with beer),
B&B

Music: Flume
Beer: Anchor's Mango Wheat

(Note: for the 0.05% reading this who don't understand us or our humor this is what we call 'satire' and neither of us actually believes any of these ridiculous things)

126 comments:

  1. B&B:
    Okay, I fully understand where Brian is coming from (except when confronted by a bear in your tent at 3AM while camping in one of America's beautiful and scenic national parks).
    I do favor Brandon's take, but since guns aren't for everyone (on the law-abiding side of the political tug-of-war fence) there has to be oversight by the citizenry itself (namely gun shop owners).
    We are guaranteed the "right to own and bear arms" by our Copnstitution (doesn't mean just rolling up one's sleeves), but I also believe that RESPONSIBLE OWNERSHIP of ANY firearm has to be paramount.

    Having NO guns will NEVER happen (criminals will ALWAYS manage to get them, and usually by ILLEGAL means). Having guns in the hands of mentally-unstable people is a major public safety issue as well.

    We have PLENTY of GOOD, solid laws on the books now to deter the wrong people from getting guns (legally), and all that needs to be done is to stringently ENFORCE those laws.

    But, that's just my opinion, guys.

    Very good article worthy of much honest debate.

    Stay safe (and classy) out there.
    (and tell Brian to stop chucking rocks at deer...lol)

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    1. Don't worry, Bob, it's all just a joke and we don't believe any of this, so you don't have to side with either of us. I know we sure wouldn't side with us.

      I did finally kill that deer, though. Turns out that after 4 hours of throwing rocks at a deer that he'll just die of boredom. My venison tastes like regret.

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    2. I knew you guys were having fun, but one point Bob did not make-if you look at history, usually when the government disarms the people it does not go well.

      Like Germany around 1930....

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  2. I am with Brandon 1000%. ....I also live in a place that is over 30 minutes from the nearest law enforcement, so yeah I'm not waiting around for the cops, you break in and you get blown the f**k away.

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    1. "Hey Mich, surprise! We're in town and just wanted to drop by to visit one of our favorite blogger fri-"
      *BLAM!*
      *BLAM!*
      (Maybe we should have knocked first)

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    2. I only lived in Philly for 3 years and I still sleep with a hunting knife under my pillow. I guess that's an improvement from sleeping with it in my hand.

      Please knock first. I still cannot guarantee your safety. Hold out the case of beer ahead of you by way of greeting.

      Delete
    3. Nothing says 'don't shoot us' like a 6 pack of Weyerbacher.

      I sleep with a shotgun by my bed, because sleeping on top of it is way too uncomfortable and the wife gets jealous when we cuddle.

      Delete
  3. I live in Georgia, which is, more or less, a "guns everywhere" state. It's still a bit disconcerting to see civilians walking around with guns strapped to their hips or jammed in their pockets, ("Is that a gun in your pocket, honey, or are you just happy to see me?") but I'm afraid most people here... like a number of other states... would NOT accept any kind of laws limiting their rights to carry heat, and would likely revolt rather than relinquish any of their weaponry. I've actually had a concealed weapon license for many years, but I choose not to carry. Target shoot? Hell, yeah, but I have no interest in having a gun nearby at all times. Matter of fact, the thought kinda makes me sick. One thing I know for sure is banning or confiscating guns WON"T end gun violence in this country. Law-abiding citizens "might" comply with the law, but criminals and would-be terrorists sure as hell won't. Unarmed citizens would just give the bad guys more latitude to do their "business" without interference.

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    1. Spot on assessment, and well said! People who walk around with guns on their hips freak me out a little too, if only because road rage is a way of life around here, and I really don't care to be on the receiving end of one of those gunslingers the next time they decide to have a total meltdown over something like me honking at them for coasting into my lane and almost hitting me (regular occurrence). I fear that in that situation my rape whistle would do almost nothing.

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  4. Obviously you both know the debate isn't that binary, but let's just roll with this and throw in my penny.

    As far as I can tell from way over here with these hella strong binoculars that make light curve around the earth, "America's gun problem" is rooted in the fact that y'all have "*the right* to bear arms". If you're going to disallow civilian carrying of firearms, then you're taking away a right. Of course that's never going to sound like it can be good, so people will be mad about it. (Though we don't see as much outcry over the ever-increasing fucking of our right to privacy, but that's another story.)

    But there's also the whole "guns cause violence, they don't prevent it" thing. Numbers which probably exist but I'll just pull out of my ass for now for the sake of easy argumentation (and even if they don't exist, just imagine they do) say America's top-tier when it comes to gun-related violence. Everyone and their mad brother who needs to see a psychiatrist can get their hands on a point-and-shooter, or two, or fifty. Regulating access to firearms might be a good first step towards a safer country, without breaching that right all those patriots so blindly cling on to.
    "But the criminals will just illegally obtain guns!" At least that's way harder than flashing a kind smile to a store clerk. The barrier of entry will go up, which I'm fairly certain will deter a fair chunk of the "I get way too aggressive sometimes" gun owners. It might also help track down crime cases if guns are registered and checked as soon as they get their serial in the factory, and every other step afterwards.

    It's tough though, "guns are part of America" is definitely a valid part of the argument if you phrase it a bit more eloquently. But I can't help but compare America to Europe and sigh, "gee I wonder why our schools don't get shot up".
    Do y'all even get gun education in school? If they are to remain legally obtainable, then that should be mandatory for everyone. Teach kids respect for the weapon and the damage it can do (rather than allow them to get into a "guns are sooo cooool!" mindset). It may not help much on the grander scale of things, but it's something.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Hey, you seem pretty educated on this. You want to be our next president? You seem more qualified than either candidate here.

      Nope, no gun edumucation here. Either a parent teaches you, or you learn yourself, or you remain in blissful ignorance. I'm sure that doesn't help matters.

      And yep, you nailed it. It's a right, so taking them away isn't that simple. Plus, as mentioned in the post, there's over 300 million in this country. Once you have that many, for as many years as they've been around, and it's considered a right, removing them altogether is just an exercise in futility.

      However, right now there are ways to buy a gun without any kind of background check, and as you mentioned, people who are mentally unstable who have no business owning a gun can get one legally. It's surprising how many people constantly fight legislation that would require a background check for these kinds of purchases. You can't take away guns, sure, but you also can't hand them out like candy.

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    2. Well, I learned all I know from watching people argue about this on the internet and, uh, common sense? So there's that.

      Can you give me some of the arguments from the folks that "constantly fight legislation that would require a background check"? I honestly can't think of anything better than "it's such a hassle", so I'm curious what they're using to push back.

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    3. Wait, someone actually learned something from arguing on the Internet? We call complete bullshit! If anything, reading those arguments just lowers IQ points.

      So the people that fight that kind of legislation act like it's a step toward fully taking away guns. And replace 'hassle' with 'harassment'. Some of these folks argue that having to consent to detailed background checks is harassment and an invasion of privacy.

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    4. Good luck to them if they ever want to take a plane then. I can see where they're coming from, it being an invasion of privacy, but this is one of the rare cases where (if done properly) giving up a little privacy (for those in a specific group: gun owners) can actually contribute to a safer society.

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  5. What Bob said. (Because it would take me too long to type all of that.)
    When the only guns in a country are owned by the government (and the criminals, of course) then the common people should be very worried...

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    1. I have a feeling that angry rednecks everywhere would be barricading themselves in their homemade bunkers with all 200 of their guns and would reenact the Alamo just to protect them... so I don't see that happening any time soon.

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    2. In my state, that would be most of the population then...

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  6. Brandon is so wrong, so wrong.....I want a gun!

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    1. Just come over here to the US and you can buy a whole suitcase full. Bring some home for your friends and loved ones!

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  7. Bryan has the right way of thinking. That amendment was created when there were still muskets. In my great country, Canada, which is great by the way, I mean we have the mighty beaver as our mascot, one can own a rifle for hunting. Of course there are nuts with guns and shooting but not nearly to the degree of the nuts in The States who have a bible in one hand and a gun in the other. Now everyone wants to feel like John Wayne in a western and have them in holsters. I just don't get it but then we are not a fear based country. How's that for speaking ones mind:)

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    1. I think we all aspire to be Canada, and at this point, we all know that's not going to happen. Maybe one day we'll make our way out there, though, if we can survive all of the crossfire.

      Also, do keep in mind that while the amendment was made when muskets were still around, it was also made in an era where things like this could be found. So the founding fathers were very aware of guns firing more than one round at a time when they wrote that amendment.

      [im]http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_59GYpEVAu0U/TCb84S4_BTI/AAAAAAAAANw/AVbjCqrZ3iM/s1600/24-barrel_pepperbox.jpg[/im]
      [im]http://sadefensejournal.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2014/12/iwa07.jpg[/im]

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    2. Ahhhh yes, very true but they were not exactly precise and not the weapons we have now. The sad thing is that there seems to be more gunfire in Toronto than ever before. It is such a shame.

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    3. Psssh, who needs to be precise when you can fire 20 bullets from the same pistol? ;)

      It's sad that there's gun violence everywhere. I can't believe there's ANY where you are. I hear even road rage is getting out of control in Canada (I thought that was just an American thing, too). Just a couple weeks ago a famous MMA fighter was killed by two guys in a pickup truck that ran him over in a parking lot because of road rage... just 3 hours after the guy had proposed to his girlfriend. Took place in Edmonton. Sad. Sad sad sad.

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  8. Oh my God! Enough about the guns! I can't take it. My husband is always ranting about taking away the guns.Yes, I believe in gun rights and I do believe some changes need to be made. A couple friends came out here to target practice cause the son had gotten a hand gun and a carry and conceal permit and they could not hit jack shit. They had to be 20 feet away to hit what the target was on. Plus, the guy with the carry and conceal is not all there and it is concerning that he can just be walking around with one. If you have a gun, you need to know how to use it with some degree of accuracy or it is not safe.

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    1. Yeah, the amount of gun talk right now is off the charts (sorry for adding more to the pile!) and nothing ever changes. Just more squabbling. And concealed carry gets scary when you have someone like that. Don't know if you ever saw the news story, but a while back some dude was trying to shoplift from a Home Depot, and this woman went running after him firing her gun. The guy got away, and the woman was charged because A) the guy was just stealing items, not hurting anyone and B) she could have hit an innocent bystander. Her aim was just awful.

      That is definitely one of those cases where she needs to learn how to use her gun (including WHEN) before actually using it.

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    2. I had not heard about that. To get a permit here, you need to take a three hour course and that's it. You get your permit. The hunter's safety course is a day long thing and that includes learning to shoot.
      This guy loves to drink and get into fights at bars Guns are not good in that scenario.

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    3. Here in Denver, the Road Rage Capital of the World, when some angry jackass pulls up beside me or follows me to a parking lot to start yelling about how he's going to kill me, etc etc etc, all I can think about after I tell them to buzz off is, "God, I'm glad that idiot wasn't carrying a gun."

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  9. I don't need a weapon because I AM a weapon. But yeah, I agree with whatever comedian said to make every bullet cost about 10 grand. That way you know whoever gets shot deserved to get shot.

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    1. Your body may be a weapon, but I bet it's not bullet proof.

      Guns: 1
      Chiz: 0

      Delete
  10. Haha! Love this post. I sleep with a gun beside my bed, and carry it in my car when traveling at night or in areas I think are dangerous. True story, my sister and I were going to my uncles funeral, a few hours drive away. I got out of town and remembered I forgot my gun. I told her this and Emmy piped up from the backseat. Are we really gonna need a gun at a funeral. We both said "with our family,Yes!" I think we need laws to keep them out if the hands of the mentally unstable (but as someone who is documented clinically depressed who that mean no gun for me?) I just don't have an answer for the gun debate. Get one if you want, don't if you don't, and for the love of god don't point at anything unless you need to kill it for food or to save a life.

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    1. Ha! That's hilarious. I know how that goes. In our families, a wedding and a funeral are the two places you'll probably most want to have a gun by your side.

      And yes, I've wondered that myself. Sure, we need laws to keep guns out of the hands of the mentally unbalanced, but I have depression that's been diagnosed and documented by a doctor. It's minor depression, and it's treated with simple meds, but would that mean I wouldn't be able to legally own a gun, either?

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    2. I have never seen anyone for my depression, but I have been on the suicide end of that bottomless pit. So I do not keep a gun because if/when I get that depressed again, I do not trust myself.

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    3. Hey anon, and thanks for the awesome comment! Good for you, for being able to acknowledge your depression and for having the self control to keep away from guns. I was reading recently that 90% of people who attempt to commit suicide and fail regret it immensely and never try again, and also that those who have access to a gun have a much higher job of succeeding, because of how deadly the gun is compared to something like pills. Most people don't truly want to die deep down, but the depression sort of talks them into it, and easy access to a gun makes it way more final.

      My depression is physical. I get lethargic, and can't focus, and more than anything I feel upset that I'm not more productive. I've never had any desire to hurt myself, but if one day I ever should, then I'm getting rid of my gun.

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  11. I don't have a gun and I don't want a gun.

    if someone else wants one, that's okay.

    But please don't use it on me.

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    1. That is way too simple and polite with not nearly enough yelling and name calling to be a proper gun-related statement on the Internet.

      15 points deducted.

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    2. I will try harder next time.

      I can always add that anyone who doesn't agree with my last comment is the kind of person who is dragging this country down. And is also a fascist Dumbocrat.

      I'll also try and include more randomly capitalized and misspelled words. This is how internet trolls are born.

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    3. Spoken like a true Republicant. I would try to Educate you but clearly your an Idiot.

      Delete
    4. (Also, all points reinstated, plus 10 points for Gryffindor)

      Delete
  12. I side with gun owners but I never get into debates about it because typically, neither side really wants to be convinced of the other side's validity. That said, I absolutely LOVED the points made on both sides here. You guys can take a hot topic and make us laugh at the sheer lunacy on both ends of the argument. That's a gift, baby. A rare gift.

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    1. Thanks! I think you just described why we don't debate anything on the Internet, because people don't want to change their minds, they just want to squabble until the other person just sighs and logs off.

      "Wow, you presented some valid points here, points that I'll have to sit back and reflect on. Thank you for this conversation. I've learned a lot." - No one on the Internet, ever

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  13. I agree with those that have said that giving everyone guns or taking away all the guns won't solve anything. It's about respect, responsibility, and good sense... which are sorely lacking these days.

    I don't own a gun and I don't want one. I do have an attack cat. He can give villains those eyes... We're still working on learning swashbuckling, though.
    [im]http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2014/06/13/article-2657035-1EB9365300000578-176_634x505.jpg[/im]

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    1. I love your attack cat. I have one myself. 8 lbs of fury. She's currently practicing hand-to-hand combat on a slightly crumpled ping pong ball. If that ping pong ball is anything like a 200 lb. armed male, then would-be robbers are in TROUBLE.

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    2. SQUEE LOOK AT THE KITTY!!!!!!!!

      Sorry, I couldn't help myself. I know, I know.

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    3. That picture used to be my desktop background and as a grown ass man I am not ashamed to say that.

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  14. I'm with Birgit on her comment. (I'm from Georgia too, and had a cousin point a gun at me and my little brother when we were little kids. She was playing but saying, I could shoot you. She got it from our grandma's drawer location. When I told my mom, we found out the gun was loaded. . .) This is the same cousin who dared me to pick up a rattler. I didn't but I considered the many ways a snake could be picked up without getting bitten. I was about 8 yrs old. . .I'm sure you can guess I am against guns, but the USA likes to hang on to that outdated Bill of Rights. Canada border guards will confiscate your weapons most times at the border. It seems everyone going to Alaska via British Columbia has a gun or five or more with them. (Shucks, they took my favorite gun, ma.) Timely post when you consider several black people and many police have seen the consequences of gun love. PS - all members of my family (I think) have had their own guns, because...everyone else has theirs and it is the deep south. I'm the black sheep who left for greener and cooler pastures.

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    1. Well of course you don't need a gun, because you have your pet rattle snake to defend you from all of your polite fellow Canadians.

      Also, the number of guns in Alaska is astronomical, but you have to take into account that 98% of those guns are owned by Sarah Palin and family.

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    2. No snakes for pets either, I'm with Indiana Jones on that one. (why did it have to be. . .) And I thought those Palins were loaded for 'bear'.

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  15. Because I don't have time for a long thing, I'll keep it to the short.
    I'm fairly anti-gun.
    The 2nd Amendment was not intended to be a right for every friggin' person to be walking around with a gun. It was guaranteeing the right to form militias which was intended as a preventative to soldiers coming and living in your house, as happened during the Revolution. That militia is known as the National Guard. At least, that's what it was intended to be when it was formed.
    The 2nd Amendment was not reinterpreted to mean the stuff about individual gun ownership (that stuff the NRA pushes) until the 60's or 70's, I forget.
    At any rate, all of this "it's my right!" and "Constitution! Constitution!" is a fable.

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    1. Well, if you want to join our militia, we're meeting up at 4:00 today. Bring refreshments or a baked good, preferably gluten free, and we can only assemble until 9:00 because Mike's wife needs to get up super early in the morning for work and all of the gunfire keeps her up.

      So far no soldiers have forced their way into our homes, so you have to admit it's working.

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    2. BEER BOYS, you know who I hate more than ANYONE in history? I hate Richard Henry Lee, Samuel Adams, Tench Coxe, and George Mason! Those guys were un-American traitors who ALWAYS seemed to get it SO WRONG!

      To preserve liberty, it is essential that the whole body of the people always possess arms, and be taught alike, especially when young, how to use them. … The militia shall always … include, according to the past and general usage of the States, all men capable of bearing arms. … A militia … are in fact the people themselves … [and] are for the most part employed at home in their private concerns.
      ~ Richard Henry Lee
      (Signer of The Declaration Of Independence and a framer of the Second Amendment)
      .
      The militia is composed of free citizens.
      ~ Samuel Adams
      (Signer of The Declaration Of Independence known as “Father Of The American Revolution”, and a brewer of fine ales)
      .
      The militia … are … the people at large.
      ~ Tench Coxe
      (Attorney General of Pennsylvania and Assistant Secretary of the Treasury under President George Washington)
      .
      Who are the militia? They consist now of the whole people.
      ~ George Mason
      (“Father of The Bill Of Rights”)

      DAMN THOSE GUYS!

      ~ D-FensDogG
      'Loyal American Underground'

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    3. Well, Sam Adams was probably just drunk when he said that, after all that time spent making Boston Lager.

      Delete
  16. The whole right to bear arms was made when one still stood a chance to defend themselves against the British or the "evil" government. Now unless you own a bazooka your measly guns won't do a damn thing against a drone attack or a bomb or something. So anyone trying to pull off that argument is a moron. "big bad government is coming for me" Pfffft

    I don't see an issue with people that are background checked up the ying yang and made to take mandatory certification having a gun. But there is no need to own sniper rifles and any high powered crap. A bullet is a bullet. Generally thieves aren't going to rob you with a semi automatic. If they could afford a semi automatic they won't be robbing some piddly house.

    We have plenty of guns up here but they are controlled just like many other countries. There are bad people in every one of the countries too. Guess what? Nowhere near as many shootings in any of them.

    The US never grew out of the old west mentality. And the NRA up the politicians asses is never going to let that change.

    What was that I said? Wait a second. All false. The big bad government is after you, get your muskets and fight off those alien craft in the sky. It will work so well.

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    1. Oh and you can't take tooth paste and hand soap on a plane, because gosh darn you could make a bomb. But you can take a rifle and bullets in as carry on, because the right to bear arms says so. "True Story, sadly"

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    2. Hey, when the government comes knocking - and it WILL - I plan on dispatching all of them with my discreet lady's ankle gun.

      [im]http://files.harrispublications.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/6/2013/09/CCH_3-0287-copy.jpg[/im]

      You cannot kill that which you cannot see coming.

      Also, did you see that news story about the guy who was parading around an airport with an assault rifle, loaded with a 100-round ammo drum, simply because the law said he could? That, uh, doesn't make me feel all that safe. I kinda want my toothpaste bomb back, you know, just in case I need it.

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    3. haha yeah, saw that story. Toothpaste bombs may sure be needed. Or rum, a lighter and a rag, they are all God given rights, right?

      Delete
  17. I love that you guys did a take on the absurdity on both sides of the argument. I definitely lean more towards Bryan's postion, but I do have to admit that just getting rid of guns isn't as easy a solution or as easy to do as it sounds.

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    1. With a subject like this, the only way we're going to get anywhere is compromise. But it's amazing how many people think just banning all guns is going to solve anything. "You're right, I'm not responsible enough to have these $2,000 worth of guns. Please take and destroy them!" Just like it's amazing how many people think that if we all just had guns that those who wanted them banned would magically change their minds. "Wow, you're right, now that I own an assault rifle I love guns! I think I'm going to buy 10 more right now!"

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  18. I've only ever had three debates about Gun Rights Vs. Gun Control, and all three were very short debates. Each lasted only as long as it took me to chamber a round and discharge it.

    ~ D-FensDogG
    'Loyal American Underground'

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    1. I'm assuming that round is a musket round, so... forever?

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  19. I have some guns, but I never carry them. I used to hunt a bit, but no longer have the time. There are other things to do that cost less. I live in the country and once in a great while it is good to have a rifle, but none are quickly available. It takes a few minutes. I usually don't lock my doors either and when the time comes that I feel I need to it will also be time to move. I am kind of in between you two, but I still read the Constitution as saying a well regulated militia should have them. Not everyone and his/her mother.

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    1. Hey, what a coincidence, we're between us too. We're also a well regulated militia, so the guns we own are justified. So keep those doors unlocked, citizen. No soldiers will be making camp in YOUR house tonight.

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  20. I think Japan has been the ideal model for gun control for the world. A regular guy can get one in Japan, it's just a very difficult process where most people say "why bother?"

    They've never had a school shooting or anything even close to what the United States has seen. Nor does more than a handful of people die from gun homicide each year either.

    Most robbers in Japanese fiction (based on a real-life Japan not a fictional land or alternate time in the future) are seen with knives not guns. They can do far less damage with one of those than the other.

    Dallas has open-carry and there were many "patriots" on the streets when the carnage began. Not one of those "patriots" did anything, they ran.

    And the robber situation is often just paranoia. Rule #1 is never enter a house with people in it. And if one happens to catch you by surprise, you'll most likely have nothing on your person. If you have enough time to grab a firearm, you most likely have time to hide and dial the police.

    But I'd just be happy with background checks. The NRA is letting people on terrorist watch-lists be able to get anything they want. That's pure insanity. And lets not forget to mention the mentally ill and criminals.

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    1. Well, most people talk a big game until it actually comes time to step up or shut up. In that case, it might have been better that there weren't a slew of terrified people firing wildly and just winging each other.

      Background checks aren't much to ask for at all, and we still don't understand why something as simple as making sure you aren't a mentally ill criminal with a violent history before buying a gun infringes your rights.

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  21. WOW, you guys really jump into the belly of the beast when it comes to hot topics. As always, your cartoons are hilarious. While I am pretty close to being a rock thrower that would call 911 in case of a threat, I am not opposed to people having guns. However, I don't have a problem with strengthening the background checks, requiring registration and/or permits, and mandating some training for gun owners. I really don't get the connection on how any of that is restricting people from having guns. Most things required some type of bureaucracy to obtain. I agree that criminals aren't going to follow the rules but that is really a separate issue. Here where I live you have to have a concealed weapon permit to carry a concealed gun but a permit isn't needed for open carry. That makes no sense to me.
    [im]http://i328.photobucket.com/albums/l332/Cheryl_Perzee/gun%20control_zpsyc26ksjr.jpg[/im]

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    1. Ha! Love the comic. And no disagreements here. Especially on the gun training. As mentioned to someone above, there was a news story that went around a while back where a guy was shoplifting from a Home Depot and a woman with a conceal carry permit started firing at him. She missed because her aim was absolutely awful (thank God) and was actually charged by police, not just because the man wasn't hurting anyone and it wasn't a life/death situation, but because she could have killed an innocent bystander with her wild spray of bullets.

      Much like a car, just because you own a gun doesn't mean you know how to properly use one.

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    2. I love the comic too! Very true. And I remember seeing Jon Stewart talk about how we campaigned and legislated against drunk driving and it ACTUALLY MADE A DIFFERENCE (for all the people who go "but criminals wont follow the laws").

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  22. I will admit that all this gun stuff is enough to make me want a gun. For the most part I see both sides. I don't think they really serve a purpose beyond protection and hunting. At the same time it would be nice for everyone to be on equal footing. I'm not saying absolutely everyone should have a gun. I'm all for gun control. Let's keep guns away from crazy people and criminals eh?

    Basically I guess I think either everyone should have one (or have the potential to have one) or no one should have them. By which I mean destroy every single gun in the world. Good luck with that one though.

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    1. You wouldn't think that keeping guns away from crazy people and criminals would be too much to ask for, but for some gun nuts, even asking that is like stripping away rights. No idea why.

      You ever play Duck Hunt? I did. And I loved it. It was one of my favorite games growing up. And now that I've grown up, I just happen to love the adult version - shooting clay pigeons with a shotgun. We both do. It's a literal blast, and it's challenging to hit something so small out of the sky that is always flying at different angles. But years of playing video games have made me kind of a natural.

      So what I'm saying is something that most people don't want you to hear - guns CAN be fun. And it's entirely possible to have fun with them without hurting anyone whatsoever.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GbJSrmuPa48

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  23. My take is, I believe that every law-abiding, non-felon should be able to own a gun if they so choose. I also most fervently hope that if you are the kind of person that couldn't hit the red side of a barn (like me), that you would be smart (like me) and NOT own one.

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    1. A firm amen to that. As we already mentioned the wacky story of the woman who started firing wildly at a shoplifter in a public parking lot, we'd much prefer you just stand aside and call for help if we ever got attacked than start firing at the perpetrator wildly, miss, and kill both of us in the process (while the perp just runs away).

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  24. This is a tough issue, but I believe people have the right to own guns. Should there be better screening? Absolutely. Criminals will always have guns. With all this craziness going on more people are applying for permits. In some states it can take 6 months or longer to obtain said permit. Background checks are needed. jmo...

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    1. No disagreements here. We can't realistically have no guns at all, and we can't realistically force guns upon people to make them like them. We need some middle ground. Better background checks so that crazy people and criminals can't legally get guns seems like a step in the right direction, but what do we know? We're just two idiots that doodle on the Internet for attention.

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  25. I've totally made that obama joke too - why wont he take away our guns like he promised?!? So frustrating. #hehadamandate

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    1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhY9Zxv1-oo

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  26. Well, I've gotta tell you that I honestly believe there's no real solution to this debate. No matter what the government may try to do to "control" the purchase and ownership of guns, sickos, weirdos, and crazies will always manage to get their hands on weapons if they want them.

    And people who use guns for their own personal enjoyment...I only have one strong opinion about that: People should be forced to take a basic IQ test, consisting of only 3 questions:

    1) True or False: Guns should be left within easy reach of children. And they should always be loaded with the safety turned off.

    2) True or False: If a shady-looking dude wearing a hoodie and sunglasses comes up to you and asks to borrow your gun "because he needs to pay a special visit to an ex-girlfriend", you should definitely hand it over.

    3) True or False: Shooting people is illegal.

    I think we could weed out quite a few people with those three questions.

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    1. Damn, I failed the quiz. Didn't get a single one right. Here, take all of my guns. All 37 of them (because guns are like Lays potato chips - you can't just have one).

      I think that's the ultimate truth that no one wants to admit, that there really is no answer to this. Sure, there are things we can do to improve the situation, but there is no magic law that'll make people stop shooting each other. I wish there was, but it really isn't that black and white.

      The finger pointing is especially useless. Mass shooting happens. The nation mourns for a moment, and then suddenly erupts in anger. "The Republicans did this because we should take away gun rights!" "No, the Democrats are to blame because good people should have guns to protect themselves!" Uh, I'm no rocket surgeon, but I'm pretty sure an entire political party didn't cause a mass shooting.

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  27. I haven`t read any other comments - no time sorry, but I am 100% behind Bryan. NO GUNS. If recent events haven`t convinced you Brandon, then look at the countries that don`t have guns. Yes, we do get problems now and again, but nothing like the States. As for defending your home, in all the millions of homes, how many get invaded by gun toting criminals and how many of you gun toting civilians would actually be able to kill someone anyway.

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    1. Ha! Don't worry about reading comments, and don't worry about either of us thinking like this, because we don't. It was just showing the ridiculousness of how some people think.

      I mentioned it above, but there was a story here recently about a guy who was shoplifting from Home Depot, and a woman with a gun actually started shooting at him in the parking lot. She missed, and he got away, but the woman was charged by police because she put innocent people in danger over a crime that wasn't even that big of a deal. Certainly not worth shooting over.

      People like that definitely do NOT need a gun!

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    2. You are so right. Terrifying. I was thinking this morning, if you can't get a gun, you can always use a truck.

      We had a friend in NC who swore he would shoot anyone who tried to take away his guns, that is anyone, legal or otherwise.

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  28. How can I choose between two awesome guys on an issue that people feel so strongly about? But I will say, for the record, I live in a well armed house, don't ever try to rob me.

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    1. Because this is American and you must pick a side! Guns or no guns! Republican or Democrat! Coke or Pepsi! There can only be ONE!

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  29. I can understand the stance of both sides. Those who want access to guns and those who think most people shouldn't have them. I think that we should be able to get a gun if we want one. Even if we take all the guns from people who have them legally, there still will be those people who sell them on the black market. Bag guys and every day citizens will still be able to get a gun if they want one.

    I also think that there needs to be those background checks. Now those background checks aren't going to stop some people who have no business having a gun from getting one. But we should still have the choice in getting one.

    When I was 12 years old, my mother's boyfriend at the time decided he wanted to commit suicide. I just happen to walk in on him right before he put the gun to his head and pulled the trigger. So he decided it would be a great idea to point the gun at me and tell me it was my fault and let me think for a few horrid seconds that he was going to kill me too. Then he turned the gun on himself and pulled the trigger killing himself in front of me. Now if that wasn't bad enough, my mother went a little crazy for a while after that and she fought to get the gun back after the funeral. One night I'm sitting in my bed and a bullet smashes through the closet between my room and my mom's, whizzes right above my head...landing in the wall I'm leaning against right above my head. I called the police and they took the gun but left my crazy mother there because she said she was cleaning the gun and oops it went off.

    Now if someone like myself can go through all that and still believe that we should all have the right to own a gun...I don't know..what does that say?

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    1. Wow, what a story. We can't imagine going through any of that. And you bring up a great point: taking your personal experiences out of the equation. Way too many people make this whole thing personal, which isn't a great way to judge a topic like this, anyway.

      Person who held a gun and felt terrified by it: "No one should have guns, these are scary!"

      Person who goes target shooting as a hobby: "Everyone should have a gun! These are so much fun!"

      Neither of those are acceptable arguments on deciding who in our country can and can't have a gun.

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  30. ~Scroll, scroll quickly, don't read the comments, scroll, damn you, scroll!~ My internal monologue right now.
    Jim Jeffries to me has the greatest bit about guns. Then again, Bill Burr has a great bit about guns on the other side of the spectrum. I believe all jokes in favor or against gun ownership are fair game.
    The only person who should own a gun is this guy:
    [im]http://www.gifbin.com/bin/1236337872_fat_guy_shooting_his_gun.gif[/im]

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    1. We've actually had some great comments from both sides. It's not anything like those awful news website comments where everyone's calling each other a libtard and a republicunt. We love any and all jokes about guns - for, against, as long as it's hilarious.

      Also, the scary thing about the kind of gun in that GIF is just how easy they are to upgrade to a weapon of mass destruction like this.

      [im]https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/49/5c/90/495c908f0a8180afda70ebaac7845d74.gif[/im]

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  31. Being married to a West Virginia redneck we got all kinds of guns under our bed. And, each of our sons was proudly given a 22 for Christmas when they were about 10 years old. Nuthin' says Santa came like ammo in your stocking!

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    1. Wow. For my 10th birthday I couldn't even get a Red Ryder, carbine action, two-hundred shot range model air rifle. Ma said I'd shoot my eye out. :(

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  32. I love the labels you have on this post. Just as funny as the post. That poor deer, being pummeled by stones. True story: my first hubby (didn't know him at the time) was so horrified by watching an episode of Silver Spoons as a kid that he refused to go hunting with his father. His father was pissed! Eventually, he got over it and became an avid hunter though...so, there is that.

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    1. Hunting's a ton of fun*. I've gotten really good at killing clay pigeons, but admittedly, they aren't very good to eat afterwards. Chipped my tooth on one, actually.

      *I've never been hunting

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  33. The problem with gun ownership is that everyone if everyone has a gun then people will want something more powerful. Handgun to semi automatic, then to AK47. Before you know it everyone's packing thermo-nuclear weapons! That can't be good!

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    1. I bought a rocket launcher in just 15 minutes yesterday without even requiring a background check and I'm just disgusted. Anyways, I'm off to blow shit up! BRB!

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  34. Maybe only deer should have guns.

    Quite frankly, I am more interested in some of the other political issues you raise...like paper or plastic.

    And for the luvva Pete, please tell me once and for all....which way is the #$@%$ toilet paper supposed to go?

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    1. Clearly as a cat person you have to know the answer is paper. Not that it's better for the environment - it's actually not - but you can use the bag afterwards as a free cat toy. All you get with a plastic bag is a free dog shit collection bag.

      And honestly, cat toy > dog shit.

      As for the toilet paper thing, most people don't understand that it's supposed to go this way.

      [im]http://img.memecdn.com/some-men-just-want-to-watch-the-world-burn_c_753865.jpg[/im]

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  35. Maybe the terrorists have it right: the armed and unarmed all die in proximity of a suicide bomber. Or suicide plane hijacker. Or suicide truck driver.
    If you "never bring a knife to a gun fight", then what do you bring to a suicide-bomber fight?

    I'm so sick of the hate. Where's my beer.

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    1. We're sick of all the hate and the violence too. Maybe the answer is that you bring a beer to a suicide-bomber fight. If you're going to die anyway, might as well be liquored up and happy?

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    2. That. Is an awesome idea.
      I was joking, of course, but you cheered me right up! (beered me up)

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  36. Good God. I personally hate guns but I have family members and friends who own them. That said, all of those people ARE SMART. When I was little and we visited my grandparents' house, we knew where the gun was and that if we EVER found it outside of its place, we were to go tell an adult immediately and not touch it.

    I'm against guns in the hands of hateful and stupid people. I think most people outside of the NRA would agree with that.

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    1. Wow. Amazing that your 8 year old self was more qualified to handle a gun responsibly than some adults we both know.

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  37. I support the 2nd amendment and come from a long line of hunters and doing prohibition, some that might be called outlaws, but I also see no reason we don't have universal background checks or why ordinary citizen needs an assault weapons. But really, more laws? Because the ones we have are enforced so well?
    I have to hand it to you brave guys, you're not afraid to step in it. You two could be Freedom Fighter Fighters even if you only have rocks to use.

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    1. What, you don't hunt with an assault rifle like we do? It's great! Sure, my venison has 47 bullets in it, but that deer went down so easily. And the tree next to it.

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  38. No need to reinvent the wheel. Learn from other countries, is all I have to say, fellas.

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    1. Hmmm, that could work. What are the gun laws like in Bora Bora...?

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    2. No guns, only BBQ and beautiful women.

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  39. I have mixed feelings on this. I don't own a gun but I don't have a problem with RESPONSIBLE ADULTS in own a gun/handgun/rifle. I do believe that there has to be some kind of sanity when it comes to gun control, but more laws are not needed. Enforce the ones you got.

    And I'm sorry, but assault weapons should be made illegal for consumer consumption. Keep them with the military, where collateral damage goes unnoticed.

    Father Nature's Corner

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    1. But I'm telling you, you haven't truly lived until you've gone hunting with an AK-47. Deer are fast, but they really aren't designed to zig and zag past a hailstorm of bullets.

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  40. I believe that we should be able to own a gun. That being said, I don't see a problem with reasonable measures to guarantee as much as possible they don't wind up in the hands of a lunatic. For instance, I bought a shotgun a few months ago and was able to pretty much immediately walk out of the store with it following an internet background check. While I may be an upstanding citizen (albeit warped...have you SEEN my blog?) what's to say I wasn't getting that firearm to blow someone's head off who ticked me off in the frozen foods section?
    Bryan's beliefs would be fantastic were it not for the fact that we're talking about human beings. And human beings are quite often beasts bent on taking things from other people (their property, their lives, etc).
    Okay, this is serious and I've given myself a headache. I'd rather goof around.
    Pull my finger?

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    1. Had that background check been more intensive, we assure you they would have read your blog and immediately confiscated that shotgun from you.

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  41. I believe that we should be able to own a gun. That being said, I don't see a problem with reasonable measures to guarantee as much as possible they don't wind up in the hands of a lunatic. For instance, I bought a shotgun a few months ago and was able to pretty much immediately walk out of the store with it following an internet background check. While I may be an upstanding citizen (albeit warped...have you SEEN my blog?) what's to say I wasn't getting that firearm to blow someone's head off who ticked me off in the frozen foods section?
    Bryan's beliefs would be fantastic were it not for the fact that we're talking about human beings. And human beings are quite often beasts bent on taking things from other people (their property, their lives, etc).
    Okay, this is serious and I've given myself a headache. I'd rather goof around.
    Pull my finger?

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    1. Bryan also owns a shotgun, so his beliefs may, for the purpose of this blog, be a joke. Or he's just a hypocrite. Human beings are good at that sort of thing.

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  42. I believe that we should be able to own a gun. That being said, I don't see a problem with reasonable measures to guarantee as much as possible they don't wind up in the hands of a lunatic. For instance, I bought a shotgun a few months ago and was able to pretty much immediately walk out of the store with it following an internet background check. While I may be an upstanding citizen (albeit warped...have you SEEN my blog?) what's to say I wasn't getting that firearm to blow someone's head off who ticked me off in the frozen foods section?
    Bryan's beliefs would be fantastic were it not for the fact that we're talking about human beings. And human beings are quite often beasts bent on taking things from other people (their property, their lives, etc).
    Okay, this is serious and I've given myself a headache. I'd rather goof around.
    Pull my finger?

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    1. I pulled your finger, but the safety was off and I just got buckshot straight to the gut. What the hell is in that thing?

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  43. This is me regarding BnB posts. "Damn, they posted again, and I'm so lame I missed it. I'm tardy." Reading the post - smiling, enjoying myself immensely, wondering: They're joking, right? Of course they are, duh! Then, at at least one graphic, I burst out in loud laughter. This time it's the last one that made me go there. Thank you!

    Here's where I stand: I'm generally anti-gun, but I'm in favor of any woman (or just me) being allowed easy access at all times to one of these. I'd store it under the bed-sheets, just in case.
    [im]https://dirtysouthnews.files.wordpress.com/2012/02/sex-toys-for-guns.jpg[/im]

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    1. Isn't that gun a little... small? I can't speak for all guns, but compared to my own arsenal, that pistol seems a little... uh, wimpy. Try upgrading to the rifle version. Whatever you do, just don't upgrade to the assault rifle version. You could put an eye out with that thing!

      [im]http://67.media.tumblr.com/2a2b0f695a54e5266dd6fedcb5ed02ef/tumblr_nz4r5rJeib1v141pqo1_400.png[/im]

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    2. Haha. Damn, I should've known you have a much more manly arsenal. Alas, I've only had access to tiny ones. Thanks for your guidance. My search continues.

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  44. A few months ago i did a blog entry decrying guns .
    I criticized the US for its record on gun deaths which split my readership.
    I lost followers ( many ) and recievd hundreds of comments.....
    I learned alot about how guns are part of the american psychi
    Hey ho

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    1. Yeah, it's a real hot button issue. I don't think we've lost any readers, but wait till you hear what we think about "the blacks" and "the gays"!

      (Kidding, kidding. Please don't abandon us)

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  45. I think you both should stick to beer. Much safer. :)

    As for me and guns, I don't like them but feel people have a right to have one. In keeping with that right, I think there needs to be a revamp of the laws. If you want a gun, you should have to take a psyche test, reveal medical history, and can only buy certain types of guns.

    Then there's the illegal guns that are in this country, brought in by gangs, mafioso and corrupt cops. This is one of the bigger problems since gangs are the biggest epidemic and threat to our country.

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    1. We do stick to beer. We're still just as likely to injure/kill ourselves with alcohol, but we have 100% more fun in the process.

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  46. Truthfully, I don't like the idea of having a gun in the house, but take away the guns, you give the government free reign to become a military state and strip away our freedoms. I've always believed having the right to bear arms was a way to protect our families when and if the government should disintegrate. (As it inevitably always does.) Look at history and you see that world powers realign approximately ever 300 years, and I don't want the ability to protect my family from marauders taken away when it happens. Am I paranoid? Sure. Does that mean I'm wrong?

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    1. I think we'd both rather be overly paranoid and wrong than naive and right. Though, in all fairness, if the government ever comes for me guns a-blazin', I don't think a pistol can do much against an armored Apache helicopter.

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  47. I say we have the right to be prepared for a revolution if things go disgustingly horrible with the world. . . but I'm also scared of ever having to touch a real-life gun O_o lol Look, I dunno. The 2nd amendment is there for a reason. The problems happening, in my opinion, isn't that the guns are shooting themselves. It's the people and their sick sick minds. And guns or no guns they'll always find a way to hurt people if that's what they want. Me? I'm a scaredy 'Kat', so I'll be hiding under my desk with my kids if a tire explodes outside. BTW, that 0.05% of readers who lack sense of humor? I'm pretty sure the bullets passed right over their heads and are praying for your poor poor souls. lol

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    1. We're... actually kind of sad to see how many people took this seriously. Come on, does Bryan look like some kind of anti-gun hippie that thinks we should remove guns from every single person and replace them all with rainbow farts and hugs? Does Brandon look like the kind of gun nut that wants to arm everyone, including old people and children? How insulting.

      Guns aren't that scary after you handle one in a safe environment and have someone who knows what they're doing help you. It's all about having respect for the gun. I mean, there's a lot of rules to handling a gun that most people don't know about. Like, don't use it to scratch your ears, and don't kiss it until after the third date. I think that's straight from the NRA handbook.

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  48. If you're legally allowed to own a gun, I see no problem having one for protection.
    On the contrary...
    If you're uneducated on the device, you should probably get on that before buying.
    The restrictions could also be adjusted a tad. If you're mentally ill, suicidal, have anger issues, etc...you probably can't handle owning a lethal weapon. I'm surprised this isn't already an active law.

    It's funny you say at the park.
    Well not literally funny...
    Recently-ish in Kalamazoo an uber driver went on a shooting spree at a local kids park. Then shot at the parents trying to rescue their child(ren). Yeah...he's pleading insanity.

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    1. We're surprised that isn't a law either. It's crazy (tasteless pun not intended) how many mentally ill people can get a gun legally, and with ease.

      Here in Colorado a while back we had that guy that shot up a Planned Parenthood. He even insisted he wasn't crazy, but the state declared him insane and unfit for trial, and he's currently in a mental hospital.

      It's a scary ass world out there.

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  49. You did a great job of presenting both sides through Trump's eyes!

    Julie

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    1. I don't think it's orange enough or greasy enough to truly be through Trump's eyes but thanks anyway!

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