To date, the two of us have written 8 novels, 2 novellas, and enough short stories to fill a biblically sized tome. And all of those pieces have had completely unique characters and plotlines. In doing so, we thought we were being clever and original.
Turns out, we were being complete dumbasses.
Earlier this year, garbage-bag-full-of-farts-and-bad-ideas-with-an-awful-drag-queen-wig E.L. James released the cleverly titled Grey: Fifty Shades of Grey As Told By Christian, in which she rewrote the exact Fifty Shades of Grey novel all over again... except this time, told it from a different character's perspective.
Not to be outdone, Stephenie "I Ruined Everything Once Terrifying About Vampires" Meyer dared to dream and asked the question: "What if I wrote the exact same book all over again, but this time I made the guy a girl and the girl a guy?"
So now as of a few days ago we have Life and Death: Twilight Reimagined, which turns Bella and Edward into Edythe and Beau. Do you see what she did there? That, folks, is called creativity, and you can't buy it. We writers are just born with it.
So it got us to thinking - why are we sitting around writing original story ideas like assholes when we can just "reimagine" our existing story ideas?
Like, our zombie novel Dead and Moaning In Las Vegas has been a huge seller and gotten rave reviews. To give the fans what they truly want, why don't we release a "reimagined" version, where it's the exact same story, but this time told from the perspective of one of the zombies?
Or maybe we should turn our sights on something a little less gruesome, like our Slim Dyson novel. For this, the choice seems pretty obvious. The story will remain exactly the same, but all of the parts previously written by Bryan will now be rewritten by Brandon, and all the parts written previously by Brandon will be rewritten by Bryan.
Hell, now that we're really thinking here, why not "reimagine" the blog? We can recycle, uh we mean reinvent blog posts and turn them completely on their heads by gender swapping us, kinda like that time we did A Wine for the John. Imagine how wildly different our blog posts would be if we were both women!
Do you see what we did with last week's post about Bryan's Chinese neighbors hating him? Now instead of hating him because he's white, in this version, his neighbor hates him because he's white AND a woman. It's practically a whole new joke!
So please, join us on a journey of untapped creativity as we drop trou, take a spicy burrito dump all over our readers, and rehash everything we've ever written to death, all in an effort to scam you out of more money for something you've already read before.
If it's good enough for such literary geniuses as E.L. James and Stephenie Meyer, then it's good enough for us.
Cheers and stay classy, folks,
Beer: Upslope Blood Orange Saison
Music: Yonder Mountain String Band