Monday, September 29, 2014

Introducing Mr. And Mrs. Meyers

Hey guys. So... we're not posting this week. Not a real post, anyway. We've been way too busy. Doing what, you ask? Well, unless you live under a rock or are new here (since we've been yakking about it a ton lately), we were both working hard on this...

Center left: Brandon. Center: Reverend Bryan. Behind them: the light of the heavens shining down upon them both.

Yep, Brandon got married. And what an adventure it was.


The bride tried to escape, so we had to have her father forcefully wrestle her down the aisle. Not pictured: his taser.


Bryan said some words that made people laugh, and then passionately read a poem that made people laugh and cry. Then by using his magic powers he transformed the bride and groom into a married couple instead of just a boring single one, thereby making Heidi stuck with Brandon for the rest of her natural life.


She promptly retaliated by eating his face.

Then they went inside and ate cake and drank an ungodly amount of alcohol and the bride and groom put their dance lessons to use, in which they cut a rug so epically that the venue is keeping their damage deposit and the rug is seeking counseling.

There was laughter. There were tears. Bryan was told by many that it was the best service they've ever seen, with a few people asking for his services at other upcoming weddings. Maybe he has a future calling as a reverend... nah. His favorite compliment, from a kooky old guy: "Son, that was the best damn wedding ceremony I've ever seen. And I'm old as shit, so you know I've been to plenty."

Overall, it was a damn good time, and Mr. and Mrs. Brandon could not be happier... to have the damn thing over with, so life can get back to normal.


It took over 2 hours to unpack and assemble Brandon and Heidi to get them ready for the wedding. Elbows and genitals sold separately.


Bryan and Mrs. Bryan tired and sweaty as hell after tearing it up on the dance floor. Not properly pictured because of crappy lighting - Mrs. Bryan's awesome purple hair.


Brandon wildly attacking the paparazzi that swarmed the reception.


The great Reverend Bryan, on the way there, channeling his inner Ray Donovan with that sweet hand-me-down suit.


...Except he didn't get to sodomize a black kid with a huge pistol.

Maybe that'll happen at the next wedding he performs.

Stay tuned for a next week when we returned to your regularly scheduled awesomeness and comical idiocy.

Cheers and stay classy, friends,
B&B


118 comments:

  1. Congratulations, Brandon! And Bryan for doing an awesome job with the wedding. (I'm sure there were death threats if you botched it.)
    Keep us posted on the emotional condition of that rug...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! And it wasn't so much death threats as bodily harm, but that seemed to be enough to get the job done.

      As for the rug, well, they say it may be able to walk again some day, but only after intensive physical therapy.

      Delete
  2. Love it all, except the sodomy. You did a very classy job. It's great to see these photos. Both of your beards for hire are gorgeous too. Most people always say how beautiful the bride looks, and...you thought I was gonna say how handsome and dazzling you guys are. You are very handsome and dazzling. I don't usually say the bride looks beautiful and her wedding dress is fabulous, because most brides and wedding dresses look the same. But not this one. She looks very gorgeous, not your every-day bride. Congratulations, Brandon and Heidi, Reverend Bryan and the lovely Mrs. Bryan.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! And yes, it's amazing what a ton of make up will do. And hide.

      I'm talking about us, mind you. Not the bride or Mrs. Bryan. They always look fantastic. And because of that, the beard for hire jokes will only continue!

      Delete
  3. Congratulations, Brandon! Looked like a great wedding. Sorry I couldn't make it! Also, your bow-tie is superb.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! If you were closer than 2,000 miles* away we'd have invited you in a heartbeat. And Doctor Who brought it back, but Brandon made it look damn good.

      *We are awful with geography, so... rough estimate

      Delete
  4. Wow, um, what the hell, Brandon? Whatever is defective about her (and there has to be SOMETHING) certainly isn't apparent in pictures. If this whole thing doesn't work out, could you put in a good word for me with Heidi?

    She does know you're a writer in the age of the internet, right? Is she trying to get back at her parents? Does she just find the whole bohemian thing glamorous?

    (I'm going to stop now, because I don't know you well enough to be cracking these jokes about your family, and CONGRATS!)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! And you know why you can crack jokes about us and our families without us getting mad? Because we're writers on the Internet and we have super cool Internet friends like yourself. And frankly, if that doesn't turn a woman off then nothing will.

      Also, if Heidi chooses to be gay (because we all know it's a lifestyle choice) then yours is the second number we'll give her. The first number, of course, is of a stylist who specializes in flannel shirts, steel work boots, and mullets.

      Delete
  5. Congratulations Brandon & Heidi. Wishing you both a lifetime of love and happiness.
    Thank you for sharing your special day with us.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! And while we might call today's post "lazy," we're glad that others are seeing as "a window into our lives."

      Delete
  6. A major congratulations to the (presumably) happy couple. I've never heard a wedding summarized quite like that. I also congratulate Bryan on his first successful wedding and not being struck by lightning.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you much! And yes, now that Bryan's passed the lightning test, I suppose there's nothing stopping him from becoming a full blown reverend. And when he does, feel free to tithe at least 15% of your income toward his future, errr, career.

      (I assume this is the point where he genuinely is stricken down)

      Delete
  7. YES! I was so hoping for pictures today. Thank you for sharing. Great recap- and I'm so happy to hear fun was had by all. No major wedding mishaps or snafoos. "Elbows and genitals are sold seperately" is now my fav line of all time!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Now that I think about it, everything WAS seamless. Which is almost unfortunate, because I love using the word "snafu." Thanks!

      Delete
  8. Congratulations Brandon! You sure it's legit? I mean, Brian as minister...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! And yes, I'm an ordained minister by order of the Internet. It's all legit. The only thing not 100% legit are the Louie Vatton purses I sold out of my van later. And no, that was not a typo.

      Delete
  9. Awww congratulations all around!
    To the new Mr. & Mrs. and to the cool Reverend for not messing shit up! ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you much! And yes, there was a pretty heated moment when the bride's dad pulled a switchblade on Bryan in the back alley and said, "If you fuck this shit up, I will end your world."*

      *That may not have happened

      Delete
  10. Congrats Brandon. haha that is the best compliment you could have gotten, although when you really think about being old as shit, doesn't sound very appealing. You could have found a new calling indeed, ruling over weddings everywhere lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! And while I don't much care for the idea of getting "old as shit," I just hope that when I do I can embrace it as well as this guy did.

      Delete
  11. Congratulations! Looks perfectly legal and legitimate. Totally.
    I'm sure you can file as Married now. Yeah. Sure. Totally.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey, it really is legit. Bryan filed all of the proper paperwork and everything. He is a real life minister. You need a blessing or a baptism or an exorcism? Because he will hook you the fuck up. :)

      Delete
  12. First and foremost, conGRANDulations to 'Brandon and Heidi' (or, 'Mr. And Mrs. Meyers').

    Secondly I want to say, 6-B, that Mrs. Meyers looks MUCH HOTTER than you portray her in the 'A Beer For The Shower' cartoons. If I were her, I would be pretty mad at you... and suing you for publicly slandering her appearance.

    Thirdly... what kind of beer is that on your table in the picture of you and your wife? Correct me if I'm wrong (and God knows I hope I am) but that looks like Chinese beer! Green bottle... is that the Chinese beer that comes in the Buddha-like bottle? Say it ain't so, Joe!

    I had to Google "Ray Donovan". You know me and how I keep up with the times.

    Now, lastly, who is that woman to the right of "the father of the bride", wearing the black skirt and the sorta polka-dotted blouse? Does she belong to anyone? If not, I want to claim her off the waiver wire. Help me get this deal done and I'll fuhgeddaboud the Chinese beer.

    ~ D-FensDogg
    'Loyal American Underground'

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 1) Thank you much, good sir.

      2) Hey, there's only so much you can do with these stupid little MSPaint drawings, but I'd be happy to give her a digital makeover.

      3) Chinese beer? What, do I look like a communist? That's actually a napkin wrapped around the bottle that soaked through from beer sweat. So that being mistaken for a Chinese beer label just makes me laugh. There's a 90 Shilling under there. Or... I guess what was left of a 90 Shilling.

      4) I don't recall her name or her relation to the family, but both she and her husband congratulated me on the ceremony, so that rules out anything there. Sorry, pal. But if she ever calls me to perform a divorce on her, though, I'll give you a shout. Ministers can do that, right?

      Delete
  13. Huge ridiculous congratulations to Brandon and the Mrs! It looks like a beautiful day. I may not be old as shit but when you get a compliment like that...roll with it, Bryan!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! And as long as no one calls either of us "old as shit," I'll take that compliment all day long!

      Delete
  14. Oh my gosh, do you know how thrilled I am that you posted pictures! I kept wondering if we would see a picture, one. But you posted a bunch!! Heidi looked gorgeous...well, you all did. And happy :) Also, this is a girl thing, but I LOVED that her bridesmaids got to wear different dresses. And Heidi's dress was just beautiful. I like her style.

    Congrats Brandon, you done good, catching that beautiful creature. Good job, Bryan! Your definitely the coolest-looking Reverend I've ever seen :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! And it's true, Brandon really did well with catching Heidi. Our tip for hunting pretty white girls - lots of pumpkin lattes.

      Delete
  15. Congrats Brandon. I'm sure the wedding was one of the funnest weddings of all time! That weddings dress is amazing!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! It was so much fun it's almost worth divorcing just to do it all over again.

      ...Or maybe not.

      Delete
  16. All kidding aside, this was an awesome post and thank you for sharing such an amazing and special day with us. Congrats to the bride and groom and kudos to the awesome minister for performing such a lovely service.

    Now, the honeymoon must be over so get your butts back in gear with writing and entertaining the masses!! Haha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! And all kidding aside ourselves, the wedding was fun but man will it be nice to get back to work on actual books and posts. Stay tuned for some very, very awesome stuff!

      Delete
  17. Congratulations. That looks lie such a beautiful wedding. Thanks for sharing the stunning images.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! It was pretty beautiful... having a stunning bride certainly helps that.

      Delete
  18. Congrats to both of you!! For one, on the wedding, for the other... on the wedding. Huh. That didn't really come out right... Oh well!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It came out better than our drunken, heartfelt ramblings, so at least there's that! Thanks!

      Delete
  19. Happy Wedding to all parties involved!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! It certainly was a very involving party.

      Delete
  20. Congratulations, Brandon and Heidi! Wishing you every happiness and blessing!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We'd accept even half the happiness and a quarter of the blessing, so thank you for the generosity!

      Delete
  21. And see, out of respect for the institution of marriage, I did NOT make any beards-for-hire jokes. We all know it was really Brandon and Bryan who exchanged the vows this weekend.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for not joking about our beards, because that might have been awkward! You should have seen how hard it was to photoshop Heidi's face onto that beautiful dress Bryan was wearing.

      Delete
  22. Totally classy and entertaining too. The bride looked lovely and the groom looked happy, that's a great start. Plus we get to see the real live versions of the comic guys. Love that! (from someone who doesn't show her own face but uses an avatar)

    CONGRATULATIONS to the wedded couple and remember why you love each other! To the Reverend - Great Job!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! And if anything, we figure we should remind people what we really look like, so they don't mistake us for blocky, single color drawings should they meet us in person.

      So... wait, you're not really an Egyptian pharaoh...?

      Delete
    2. My avatar is Sekhmet, Mistress of Dread, aka Mistress of Slaughter. . .here's the post explaining how I chose this avatar.
      http://dghudson.blogspot.ca/2012/12/sekhmet-intriguing-egyptian-goddess.html

      Delete
  23. I thought you were going with the Vegas option...

    How sad that you let that opportunity go-you only have one chance to be married for the first time by Elvis...especially if it's the young "leather jacket" Elvis (as opposed to the "white jumpsuit" Elvis).

    Congratulations, though-if you can make it through a service led by a Ray Donovan impersonator, you can weather anything!

    Larry

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Back when the wife and I were in Vegas a few years ago, we tried to hunt down a Black Elvis to marry us - in honor of the protagonist of our zombie novel. Since we couldn't find one, a Vegas wedding was off the table for all of us.

      Besides, who doesn't love a service conducted by a Ray Donovan impersonator? I said about three words (gruffly), then held out my gun and told her to sign the marriage license or I'd beat her family to do death with a baseball bat.

      Delete
  24. This is officially my favourite post of all time. Brandon, you and your wife look so happy. Her gown was gorgeous and she looked fabulous and radiant in it. And Bryan, I'm so pleased that you got to officiate at your best friends wedding. But if things go tits up, you are morally responsible. You know that don't you?

    Thank you boys for the pictures.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Anne! That's mighty kind of you. And Bryan is very much aware. Good thing he has no morals, otherwise that kind of thing might make him lose sleep at night.

      Delete
  25. Awww! They're adorable! And they look so happy, which is almost as important. :)

    Well done, everyone, and congratulations to the happy couple. Way to be the world's most epically fabulous reverend, Bryan. I'd have you do my wedding if I wasn't already married...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'd gladly re-marry you. Hell, I could even divorce you guys and THEN re-marry you to make it extra official*. I mean, if you're gonna get re-married you might as well make it count.

      *After all, I AM a lawyer... in our comics

      Delete
  26. Ah, congratulations you folks! Looks like a blast of a time, but now here's the important question: do you feel old yet? I mean, you're married for god's sake, it's almost time to retire!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! We've already picked out a great retirement home with all the apple sauce we could ever eat and bed time at a very appropriate 7:30 PM.

      Delete
  27. Congratulations! I love the pictures :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! They didn't turn out half bad for being shot with a cellphone. I'm sure the REAL pictures look a lot better. Now... when we'll actually see those is another story.

      Delete
  28. Now, that's the way to get married. I wish I could see the purple hair. I sometimes have purple and pink hair. It depends on my mood. I'm never getting married again. Otherwise, I would ask you to my wedding.

    Love,
    Janie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This would be her awesome purple hair. And do keep in mind that as a fake reverend I can also do fake weddings.

      Delete
    2. Ab fab hair, sweetie baby. Ab fab. Willy Dunne Wooters would not even participate in a fake wedding. He can be kind of a party pooper.

      Delete
  29. Congratulations to Mr. and Mrs. Brandon!

    I think if I had to get married, and it had to be the old fashioned way, I'd probably want a badass reverend too.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! And I don't know if I'd call getting married on the rooftop of the museum by your brother-from-another-mother old fashioned, but it sure beats a church wedding as dryly read by Father Brimstone.

      Delete
    2. I was unaware of rooftop museum badassery. Why this wasn't on the main post is baffling.

      Delete
  30. Congrats on getting married. Since I wasn't there I will say I was there in spirit. Do you know how hard it is to transport your mental self invisibly across several states for a few hours?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, and it's definitely the thought that counts. I hope your mental invisible self enjoyed when the reverend telepathically blew up one of the bridesmaids using only his mind.

      Delete
  31. An honest and serious congratulations, and I am totally happy that everything worked out without any real hitches. Like, nobody died! Unless you count the sacrificial virgins...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you kindly good sir! And sometimes you have to sacrifice a few goats to make sure your wedding goes smoothly. No word on whether they were virgins, though, until the autopsy comes back.

      Delete
  32. Congratulations!!!! How very exciting!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! And if you use three exclamation marks, then, well, it must be pretty damn exciting (it was)!!!

      Delete
  33. Congratulations! I'd say something funny but you already said all the funny things.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! And I don't know, I'm sure there's a good fart joke in there somewhere, but since it's a wedding and we like to keep it classy around here, we appreciate you not making that joke. We have sensitive stomachs about that kind of thing and don't want to cause a stink.

      Delete
  34. Congratulations to Brandon! Glad everyone survived.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! And actually, our survival rate was about 99%. No word on if Grandma made it home, but she's a tough cookie, so I'm sure she'll show up on the back porch at some point, hungry and a little thin. It never fails.

      Delete
  35. And who took pictures of the honeymoon? Huh?
    Where's the sex tape that will catapult the two of you to fame and misfortune?
    And how does Bryan get his hair to do that?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That depends, who's "the two of you"? Somehow I think a sex tape featuring us two blog masters would be more sellable than the bride and groom. Vile, disgusting, and unwatchable for all parties, but more sellable. I mean, the gross-out factor worked for Dustin Diamond aka Screech... kinda.

      Bryan's hair just naturally does whatever he wants it to do. It's its own animal, really. It doesn't hurt that it's so thick his barber should charge him twice. But if anything, I guess it's good proof that he really does look like his cartoon character.

      Delete
    2. So hair that takes commands, huh? That's kinda cool. My hair had a mind of its own, and it got up and left with it.

      Wait, maybe Bryan's hair should make a sex tape...

      Delete
  36. How fun to see real-life photos of all four of you! Looks like a great day was had by all, lack of bouncy house notwithstanding. Congratulations!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! The lack of bouncy house was a little sad, but the bride walking down the aisle to Norwegian speed metal made all of us a little misty eyed.

      Delete
  37. Bet it was the most fun wedding around. At least told the best. Congratulations!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It may just be bias but I think it may have been one of the greatest weddings to ever grace this planet earth.

      Nah, definitely not bias.

      Delete
  38. Congrats to the couple. Looked like a wonderful and fun wedding.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Julie! And yes, there certainly were no dull moments.

      Delete
  39. Where did my comment go?

    congrats Brandon there is a God after all . How did a "forever" bachelor get married to such a sweet looking hottie?

    Reverend Bryan danced? Bryan what does job of minister bring? Do you have to step out when guests leave and wait ask for like tour guide? Do you do gothic theme weddings? How about Bollywood wedding?

    You know what goes with purple hair? A reverend dancing with orange hair :)
    congrats Brandon.

    and love the pictures every single one of them.Brandon is a daredevil who lets Bryan officiate a wedding?

    so in case Heidi had buyers remorse what is the return policy? She needs to ship him or drop off or you do pick up as well?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey mamtc, thanks and good to see you around here! To answer your questions...

      Brandon snared Heidi with one of those tiny gladiator nets. He kept her hostage in his basement until he forced her to love him, and now they're happily married. Sure, that sounds cruel, but it's not really any different than what we do with dogs and cats, amirite?

      Reverend Bryan definitely did dance, and tore it up with his awesomely outdated 80s M.C. Hammer dancing. The job of minister just involves giving the wedding ceremony, and after that, doing outdated 80s M.C. Hammer dancing.

      No goth weddings, but he'd do a Bollywood wedding in a minute. Those look like so much fun. Not even kidding. You bring the red dot, I'll bring the Benny Lava!

      And the return policy is that the merchandise can be returned within the first 30 days of purchase, unbroken, with a receipt. He's already been broken (mentally), though, so at this point I think she's stuck with him.

      Delete
    2. Cats and Dogs? My long absence has caused you memory loss I guess, I am an Indian and all these questions about Indian marriage -
      How arrange marriages work in India?
      How can woman live with wifebeaters?
      What is the secret if lesser divorce rate in India?
      How can you be married and have kids with someone you don't like ?
      How do marry a stranger and live happily ever after?
      What can rape victims be married to their rapists?

      One answer - Stockholm syndrome buddy. Based on your answer about brandon's brief episode with net, basement, hostage etc., Brandon and Heidi are Indians and you performed a Bollywood wedding.

      And minister doesn't get to have a tip jar or collect tips?

      Congrats and thank you for sharing lovely occasion with us. Please don't release any tapes please... And let the happy couple be in cloud nine, don't let their happiness cloud their judgement and let anything float on cloud....

      Delete
    3. And Benny Lava reached USA too? Sorry I didn't check video before.

      For me its more like Germans to be precise German speaking people watching the German Hitler parody video. :)

      For non-Tamil speaking people, it is India and bollywood in a nutshell. Colors, background dancers - extras and routine less routine - dance moves and senseless lyrics :)

      Delete
    4. Yep, Benny Lava was a big sensation over here thanks to that video with the funny lyrics.

      Indian culture and Bollywood is just awesome, and I'm not being sarcastic. Old guy in the Benny Lava video's got some good moves. And as for movies, how could you hate a movie that has such an awesome, over the top action scene like this?

      Singham

      Delete
    5. Hahaha. Is Pope catholic? If Newton's law of motion, gravity everything can be put to test on earth the only place where it can really be questioned and possibly fail is Bollywood.
      Anything in moderation Bryan, too much of Indian movies can cause ...say ..worse than Indian food :)

      Delete
  40. That's awesome, congratulations. Now you get to begin the period of your couplehood where everyone asks, "so, when ya havin' kids?"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! - Brandon

      My friend, I've been living that horror for the past 4 years. It just doesn't get any easier having to answer that stupid question. - Bryan

      Delete
  41. Congratulations!

    Maybe now you'll shut up about it...

    But no, really, I'm happy for y'all. Brandon and Mrs Brandon look really happy. Bryan and Mrs Bryan look, well, sort of relieved that nobody was chasing them with pitchforks and torches after the service. All of which, is very good.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. At least someone had the balls to say it! We feel like we're turning into "that guy" that's like, "You want to see pictures of my kids? I know I just showed you some last week, but this one I took TODAY. Look at it. LOOK AT IT."

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pwM_-jyKQIs

      Delete
    2. I have the lady balls to say far too many things that most people don't want to hear. That's why I don't have many friends, I think.

      That's the perfect video example. I'm gonna have to steal it to send to "that guy" and "that girl". I know a few of them.

      Delete
  42. Awe! What a beautiful Groom and Bride. That last picture kind of says it all - they really look happy. Mr. and Mrs. Bryan don't look too bad either and rather pleased with themselves. Looks like the perfect day!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Even now they still seem all happy and beautiful and glowy. I mean, at first we were all happy for them, but now it's like ugh, get a room guys.

      (Not really. And thanks for the kind words!)

      Delete
  43. Hey, now! Congrats!! That's awesome! See what happens when I don't check out your (or anyone's) blogs for MONTHS? Very attractive people get married!

    Now, more importantly, where can I get some of those genitals? (Asking for a friend.)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If you're looking for a high quality set of genitals, I'd recommend Tom's Elbow and Genital Emporium. Unlike Wal-mart, which imports most of its wares from China, Tom's is an all American made genital store.

      Because, well, you know that people don't really brag about Chinese imported genitals. "I'm hung like a Chinese guy!"

      Delete
    2. To be clear: it's my FRIEND who's looking. But thanks; I'll pass it on.

      Delete
  44. Congratulations!! Where were you when we got married? :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! The answer: not a minister. But I do re-commitment ceremonies if you're interested. I'll throw in a free baptism, too, and your next exorcism is half off if you refer a friend. Act now.

      Delete
  45. Congratulations, Brandon! You and your bride looked beautiful. And, Rev Rev Bry, that was the best compliment I ever heard. That kooky old guy must have been a blast at the reception. Awesome pictures. Thank you both so much for sharing them. (Now I know why traffic was so terrible out there - blasted celebs and their wild weddings!)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Rev Rev... I like that. Just don't call me Rev Rev Bry Bry. Oh, and thanks! I'm pretty sure they shut down the streets for us to get to the venue, like they do with the president. My bodyguard only had to kill 3 screaming girls trying to throw themselves at us. So overall, it was a pretty tame day.

      Delete
  46. Once again, CONGRABULATIONS!!!!

    Don't say you weren't warned.....heheheheheh.

    Father Nature's Corner

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You can congrabulate the hell out of us any time, my friend.

      Wait... that sounded weird...

      Delete
  47. Fantabulous! It looks like a fun time was had by all. Here's to a long and happy adventure for the newlyweds.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And may that adventure lead to haunted mansions and buried treasure and not a drunk tank or padded walls. Amen.

      Delete
  48. Hearty apologies for taking so long to get here. I've been sick. No, I am not going to elaborate that because no one wants to hear it. However, it is my excuse and I am sticking with it.

    Now... congratulation Brandon and Heidi! And to Bryan for making it a service to remember. Apparently the best some have ever been to... and that includes really old people. If the writing doesn't work out... now you have another career option. (Always a silver lining!)

    Cheers!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you much! And better late than never. Besides, who doesn't love a good silver lining? If I charge $100 a pop, all I have to do is find a few thousand couples that want to get married and I can make a full time career out of this. You know a few hundred people that want to get married? Or someone who wants to get married a hundred times?

      Delete
  49. Huge congratulations Brandon and his good lady wife! And to Bryan on what looks to be a promising career if this writing malarkey gets old!.

    The wedding looks like it was a beautiful success, even if I cant help but notice the lack of bouncy castle/ball pit combo? :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! And if you must know, the bouncy castle ball pit wasn't photographed for the blog, simply because anyone who saw how much fun we were having would instantly fall into a deep, dark depression that would consume them from the inside.

      Delete
    2. I KNEW IT!!!

      ...I am totally scrubbing something off my list and replacing it with "bouncy castle ball pit party". Yeah, that feels like something that needs to happen.

      Delete
  50. Congrats to Brandon and Heidi! They make such a lovely couple! Bryan, you really did have the Ray Donovan look going on! I'm sure your pretty wife doesn't have the same trashy mouth as Abbey! Hope more details on the ceremony will follow!

    Julie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you thank you! And I'm glad to hear finally that someone else watches that show. Not only does Mrs. Bryan not have that same potty mouth, she also doesn't have that accent/grating voice that makes me want to rip my own ears off. "Gaaaawdammit Raaaaaaay, get in the feckin caaaaah."

      UGH.

      Delete
  51. Congratulations to them both. I’m not sure how to take that ‘stuck for the rest of her natural life’ comment, it sounds like a threat to extend it with dark magics.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey, when faced with the option of "no wife" vs "zombie wife," I think we'd ALL take zombie wife. She's the woman you love, and she can feast on your enemies! What's not to enjoy?

      Delete
  52. Sorry, I am late with congratulations but, I do wish you both happiness as you start a new journey as husband and wife. Best of wishes and thanks for sharing a piece of your life.
    May your lives be blessed with love and bright dreams.

    Peace and Light always..
    Congratulations!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you much, and better late than never! We've decided we'll take congratulations up to the first full year of marriage. After that, it's just kinda weird.

      Delete
  53. Oh my goodness!!! I LOVE the pictures!!!! You guys are all too Hollywood beautiful. Unfair to be pretty and funny. :)

    Huge congratulations all around!!!! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh! And I forgot to comment on Mrs. Bryan's awesome purple hair---man! She is so cool. :)

      Delete
  54. Fantastic pictures and commentary, as usual, though the pictures are different from the typical fare here. Great stuff!!

    ReplyDelete