Thursday, October 10, 2013

The Great American Beer Festival

Starting Thursday and running through this Saturday the 12th is the Great American Beer Festival in Denver, something we'd never previously attended. Well, this year we thought we should go.

We heard some great things, but just didn't know how truly awesome it was until we showed up. And were we ever blown away. Never before had we seen so many cool guys bonding over beer.









Yep, that's right, just another wonderful year at the Great American Beer Festival. We weren't sure we'd have fun, but we ended up having a gay ol' time. We're definitely coming back next year, but we don't know if we'll bring our ladies. It seems like a 'guys only' kind of affair. You know, something the ladies just wouldn't understand.

You ever been to a real beer fest?

Cheers and stay fabulous, folks,
B&B

Music: Scissor Sisters
Beer: Schmitts Gay




90 comments:

  1. Um, guys? Put the beer down and back away slowly... Wait, don't back out. You need to see where you're going.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey, don't knock it till you've had one of Rodolfo's Swedish deep tissue massages.

      Delete
  2. A Bear Festival sounds awesome! Think of the wonders it would do to my body image issues! Affection AND beer AND drag queen Britneys!?! It sounds like a much better Disneyland!
    I went to a beer "tasting" and we tasted so many beers that my friend ended up rolling down a hill on purpose. He was a kindergarten teacher and his students' parents were there. Good times.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Any place where a grown 200 lb man gets up on stage dressed as a washed up female celebrity is a place that I don't have to worry how I'm looking.

      Also, aren't you supposed to just sip the beer and then spit it out? Oh, right, never mind, that's wine tastings. Which is why we will never attend one of those.

      Delete
  3. I've never been to a beerfest but I'm surprised it took you guys this long to go to one. I'm sure after a few beers all the Britney Spears impersonators and manly men giving free hugs just blend into one another and become a great experience that ends with several showers and you screaming "UNCLEAN".

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    Replies
    1. Still cleaner than partying with the real Britney, though...

      Delete
  4. Hmmm I think body armor may be in store should you ever go back. And ears plugs and man booby repellent and, oh hell just pick up some beer at the local store, look at a picture of Jack Nicholson sun bathing and let your dog howl, beer festival glory right there.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. No amount of body armor can stop a full-force bear hug.

      Delete
  5. Never been to one, and (shame on me) I don't intend to, really. Not that big a fan of beer is all. (Again, for shame.) Does seem like a grand ol' brotime.

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    1. If you had the right beer, you'd be a fan of beer.

      ...Maybe.

      Delete
  6. "Beer" and "Bear" look so tragically alike, don't they? Time to improve your proofreading skills, guys!

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    1. I just thought it was a really manly spelling. A mistake that could happen to anyone, really.

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  7. that probably was the real Britney ;)

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    1. It's probably the only place that will hire her these days. And hey, free beer goggles to make her look attractive!

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  8. I'm guessing you guys had a few beers (a case?) prior to showing up at this thing. That would explain why you stayed. Hopefully any whisker burn you might have suffered from unexpected hugs is gone now. I would definitely check out the apartment though - under the bed, etc., in case Britney followed you home.

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    1. Wait... I woke up with whisker burn this morning... Oh god, is Britney here with me now?

      Delete
  9. Hmmm.. Not exactly my pint of tea. Can you give me some reference or pointers to annual shoe convention or something? Where I could try all shoes in a day. Women getting wet together - that would be the shoe that would fit me and I could wear it instead of tasting wine and beer and end up being tased by some....mmm...shoesssss....

    ReplyDelete
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    1. If you find this shoe convention, let my wife know and she'll go with you. Then you can viciously fight over the last pair of cute shoes to the point that it's awkward to return to this blog and we never talk again. Sounds fun, right?

      Delete
    2. Haha. Bitch fights are way effective than lesbian porn right?
      we women don't hesitate to take our clothes off but never we take shoes off during our fights .

      "awkward to return to this blog and we never talk again?"
      - do I look like tea drinking English lady or something? I have lot many tricks under my sleeves - hate mails, followed by spam and then anonymous comments in your blog criticizing your beer and your taste in beer or under creative name like "meandmythinkinghat" and all such- may not be original but I can go all ghetto on you, Nicki Minaj style :)

      Please don't insult me again Bryan.

      Delete
    3. Yeah yeah yeah, try and leave an Anonymous comment. Go ahead. Try it. You can't? That's right, we disabled those! Checkmate!

      Delete
    4. Ok ok. No plan.think.attack. Only attack. Nicki is low brow I need something lower brow. Kanye?!

      Should I spam about beer or your blog about beer #NODISRESPECTTOBLOG
      #ALLDISRESPECTTOBEER

      Delete
    5. Kanye AND unnecessary hashtags? I YIELD. I YIELD. YOU WIN. JUST PLEASE STOP.

      #PleaseStop
      #OhGodImDoingItNowToo
      #NowICantStop
      #WeCantStop
      #WeWontStoppp

      Delete
  10. Of course I've been to a real beer convention. What the hell do you think Ireland is?

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    1. I think Ireland is a beer paradise that I need to experience at least once in my lifetime.

      Delete
  11. Yikes, guys...that looks like a veritable love fest (not necessarily the love of beer) You guys seem to be nearly as naive at Slim Dyson. Also, just a suggestion but you might want to take it easy using phrases like "we were blown" when telling people about your day at the beer tasting festival.

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    1. Well, we WERE blown away by how nice everyone was. And the prices were reasonable, so no one got bent over. But they weren't very keen on my taste in music, so they got pretty up my ass about that one.

      Delete
  12. Nah, I prefer to drink alone. Like a real alcoholic.

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    1. This may be the best comment you've ever left. 10/10.

      I believe George Thorogood said it best: "When I drink alone I prefer to be by myself."

      Delete
  13. At least you got some beer out of it.

    That's cool that they went retro with Britney. The bar around the corner from me seems to go with Gaga these days when they have their competitions and it's just not the same.

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    1. I'm pretty sure that's just Lady Gaga pandering to the gay community in an effort to keep her career alive.

      Delete
  14. I've been to a few beer festivals. I find that most of the beers taste like liquid Christmas trees, though. I just choke it down while trying to keep my face from contorting any further than a subtle wince. Anyway, I find the festivals to be jam packed with fellow bros, bro-ing out and all.

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    1. That's why you won't find me drinking the really "experimental" beers, like the 'chocolate licorice bacon' beer. It's just destined to be terrible.

      Delete
    2. The furthest out there in the Beergosphere that I have ever been willing to explore is the Sonoran White Chocolate Ale, on tap at The Main Ingredient.

      Not as sweet & awful as you'd think. I can actually see how some people (predominantly women) might really enjoy that brew. Weird but not totally off the charts offensive to me.
      - D-FensDogg

      Delete
  15. what a gay old time...too bad i"m a girl i would totally go

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    1. You'd think some ladies would help liven the place up but these guys just really didn't seem to hold any interest in that.

      Delete
  16. Its on my Bucket List to go to the Great American Beer Festival! I've alllllllways wanted to go!!! And if I don't have to wear pants?! Sah-Weet!!! Next year we'll car pool ;)

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  17. Dang, Britney is packin'!!!!! Of course "she" needs to shave "her" face and legs, but otherwise, very impressive.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. I thought she looked pretty good compared to recent outings. Her wig even looks more realistic than ever!

      Delete
  18. I went to the Oktoberfest in Germany once. It seemed like there was nothing but passed out and/or vomiting tourists everywhere. It was kind of lame so once I regained consciousness I decided to leave.

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    1. Lightweights, all of them. If you can't drink 14 beers in the span of 2 hours, then you just shouldn't leave home.

      Delete
  19. Dammit.....but not that real......I think?

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  20. Do you think Rodolfo could help me with my neck and shoulder area? That's where I carry all of my stress and tension...then again, he might not be willing to waste his talents on me. I lack certain...qualifications.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're only a twig and two berries away from the Swedish deep tissue massage of your dreams!

      Delete
  21. Have not, but should. Except I might be ignored because of the things I wear on my chest. Wow. That would be a first! Totally. Going.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Imagine it - a place full of drunk men that AREN'T staring at your breasts. Isn't that every woman's dream?

      Delete
  22. I'm not sure if you're joking or not... and that scares me.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. That thick, luscious beard on your avatar says you know exactly what we mean, sailor.

      Delete
  23. Replies
    1. The target demographic is fat bearded men over 6 feet tall, so I'd say you're pretty much the complete opposite of what they're looking for...

      Delete
  24. Are you sure they didn't mean "bare" convention?
    Britney does look better than ever. She was probably jealous of you, getting all that manly attention.

    xoRobyn

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    Replies
    1. What Britney lacked in getting manly attention she more than made up for in giving it...

      Delete
  25. Well the one I went to in AZ some years back was a little more gender-diverse, although light on craft beers-but it featured a bunch of blues bands

    I hope you did not drop your wallet at this festival....if so, make sure you kick it all the way back to your car before bending over to pick it up...and you may want to get your pants back on, too....

    ReplyDelete
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    1. A wallet? You mean that thing that carries money? Oh, don't worry, I haven't had one of those in a few years. Didn't make sense to carry around an empty piece of leather in my pants for no reason.

      Though that certainly didn't stop the bears from looking for it, now that I think about it. They kept reaching into my back pocket... why did all of them want to mug me so badly...?

      Delete
  26. "...DROP YOUR WALLET AT THIS FESTIVAL."
    Ha!-Ha! LC, That has a very different but equally relevant meaning to me. If you still have 'Billy And Billie', check out pages 88 & 89.

    BEER BOYS --
    Eew! That Beer Festival sounds too much like a typical Renaissance Festival to me (except maybe 5 to 7% ABV better).

    Beer and Alternatve Lifestyles DO NOT mix!

    ~ D-FensDogg
    [Cool! I found a "squiggy", or "~", on this Nook keyboard.]

    ReplyDelete
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    1. I always thought the Renaissance Festival was gayer. A grown man in a fairy costume playing a piccolo out-gays a group of shirtless hairy dudes any day.

      Delete
    2. Two words: Jethro Tull.

      Two more words: Jethro Tull versus Queen.

      I wonder if I could find a potential 'Battle Of The Bands' match-up for those two groups. I could title it 'BOTB #XXXEew' (Or, 'Bungle In The Bunghole').

      Alright, I think I've gone too far. (I'm back online though, so I needed to celebrate by writing something a wee-wee bit outrageous.)

      ~ D-FensDogg
      'Loyal American Underground'

      Delete
  27. I have to ask two things and I hope we'll still be friends afterwards:

    1) Did people think you were boyfriends?
    2) Did you get any boyfriends?

    I'm sorry. I really am, but somebody had to ask it, so I figured it might as well be me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 1. Let's just say that people often assume things when they see that two thin, young looking guys write books together.

      2. I already have plenty of male friends. No need for more. That was what you were asking, right?

      Delete
  28. It's funny because my boss was talking about his time in Munich for the October beer festival last weekend today and now I've seen this post! Sounds so fun, albeit a little camp, heck it wouldn't bother me either!

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    Replies
    1. I hate to break it to you then but your boss is a big gay bear.

      Delete
  29. No craft beer? Well, I didn't want to go anyway.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Pencil this one in for next year fellas - the Sydney Mardi Gras - er, for Beer, where everyone is dressed like Britney (or Kiley Minogue). Clothing is optional, and plenty of fluids flowing, mainly beer. Come as a couple and save with coupons, no pockets no problems!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Come as a couple of friends? Well, that's how we go everywhere! Why would this be any different?

      Delete
  31. So you're saying that the Bouncin Barb and her Heineken keg drawing you did for me won't be on any t-shirts there? I sold a bunch in your area. Who's in charge? lol

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    1. Apparently these upstanding gentlemen are just much too classy to objectify a busty woman. Or something like that.

      Delete
  32. These are happening a around the lake this month. Actually sounded like fun until I read this. I don't drink beer and all the rest...eewww!

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    1. I know, they totally wouldn't give someone like you any hugs OR free beers. How lame is that?

      Delete
  33. A beer fest sounds fun, though.. I don't think I'd be too happy to attend that one. Then again, maybe it'll be as easy to overlook as the mounds of gay men that are already after me. Winky smile.

    I've been to a pretty awesome craft beer place that opened up about a year ago. Their selection was insane, but I didn't think it'd be as amazing as I later found the reviewers to say. More selection than some amazing one in San Francisco? I was glad to have spent $40 there. Best beer experience ever.

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    1. You wouldn't have had to spend that $40 if you brought your adoring gay fans along with you...

      Delete
  34. Scissor Sisters. I see what you did there.

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    1. THANK YOU! So far it seems no one else did. I wonder if anyone else noticed the beer du jour...?

      Delete
  35. I must admit, it's really weird that you've done a whole post without any jokes. I mean, usually you send up a ridiculous situation whilst making yourselves seem oblivious, but I can't see anything unusual in post. Just a bunch of guys enjoying a beer without trousers.

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    1. A pantless party is just something you don't joke about. No, you just enjoy it as heterosexually as you can while doing totally manly and straight things with your new bro friends.

      Delete
  36. I've been to the ultimate beer fest: Oktoberfest, Munchen, Germany. Not once but twice.

    My first year, I got so trashed, I had to take a "nap" on the hillside along with dozens of other fair goers. Good times. Good times.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wow. Any beer fest that has a designated napping hill is too hardcore for the likes of me.

      Delete
  37. Considering how much I love beer (love it like I love dead things and dirt, which is to say not very much at all), I probably would enjoy a bear festival more than a beer festival. Although I'm guessing I wouldn't be welcome at either one? Sigh, story of my life.

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    1. Oh, you'd be welcome, but take your pick: being hit on by a gaggle of drunk men, or not being hit on at all.

      Delete
  38. I think i would run, not walk, the other way

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    1. Bears can run too, my friend. Bears can run too.

      Delete
  39. There was actually a beer festival this summer in my city.

    But I couldn't make it. Maybe next year. :(

    ReplyDelete
  40. I walked into a gay rights demonstration one day at the Capitol building here in Lansing, Mi while on a hunt for a premium cigar in a shop I had not visited. I was strolling around downtown and when I finally took notice of my surroundings I about choked and prayed there wasn't a news camera around. If I would have ended up on TV for that?? Oh Shizznickle!

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    1. If I would have ended up on TV for that I would have given one hell of an interview. Fuck it, why not, right?

      Delete
  41. Anything for the beer, anything! Amiright?

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  42. I wonder if that is what Oktoberfest is all about too? Hey as long as you got free things and they weren't against your will, it is a win win situation!

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  43. I can't say I've ever been to one. Almost all of my drinking was underage :)

    ReplyDelete