With today being Labor Day, and this past weekend being spent eating, drinking, and... well, drinking, we thought we'd go easy on posting today and resume the funny on Thursday. So for today, we're going to be brief and just give you a quick (and drunken) history on how Labor Day came to be.
Before 1781, jobs didn't exist. There was only the plague, the Spanish Inquisition, and a lot of sadness. Somewhere in there dinosaurs also roamed the earth. Anyways, in 1781 Johnny Laborseed went on a journey across America planting job seeds.
And it created one big gigantic job tree. But unfortunately, the first president of the United States, George Washington Carver (who also apparently invented peanut butter, I guess) chopped down that enormous job tree. When his father asked him about it, he famously said...
And it set upon the annual tradition of the president destroying the economy and ripping up all of those newly planted job seeds. Or something like that. Thus the holiday of Labor Day was born, in which we all take a much needed day off to reflect on how shitty our jobs are and how little we're paid.
So this Labor Day, celebrate your meager employment by drinking some piss quality beer and barbecuing some cheap, genetically modified meat by-products... because even if jobs grow on trees, that free range, organic, grass fed beef sure doesn't.
Cheers and stay employed, friends,
Beer: Big Sky IPA
Music: Washed Out
P.S. Stay tuned for Thursday when Brandon shares the epic story of being thrown into a bear's den and making it out fabulously unmauled and unmolested.