Yesterday I was out in the garage doing some work on my car. During this time, my next door neighbor was having a garage sale, and so I got to watch as various people came, and went... and bent my neighbor over for all she was worth until they cleaned her out.
Personally, in this day and age, I don't understand why people hold garage sales or yard sales. I have a whole spiel on it, but I'll save you the rambling. You see, my wonderful grandma (you know, the one who got pushed down an escalator) actually told me her thoughts on garage sales a few weeks ago. She said it better than I ever could, so I'm going to share it with you today. She said...
*Grandma's not racist, she just knows her own people (she's Mexican).
And of course you tell them, "But this table cost me $300. $50 is a steal! Okay, MAYBE I can sell it for $25, but no lower. Will you take $25?"
And your new friend says...
And they keep going until they break you. But they don't just want your expensive coffee table. No, they want everything you have.
And at this point, you just want to get them out of your hair. So you say...
To which they reply...
And after all of your hard work, you've sold everything you've ever owned to some family for a dollar. A family that's been at this a lot longer than you have -- they've been doing this every single weekend for years.
So for all that time wasted you could have just thrown everything in the trash, gotten a part time job at McDonald's, and come out further ahead...
And frankly, folks, after watching my neighbor sell a brand new printer, an electric guitar, and a bicycle for one dollar to a very stubborn Mexican family that haggled with her for over an hour today... I'd say Grandma pretty much nailed it.* If I ever want to sell something I don't need anymore, I just use Craigslist (which has brought us both a lot of luck, except for that whole gay bear thing) where I stand to make more than one dollar and won't lose an entire afternoon haggling with a family that's just looking to clean me out.
What do you guys think? Have you ever actually found success holding a garage/yard sale?
Cheers and stay thrifty, friends,
Bryan (and Brandon)
Music: The Kooks
Beer: Maui Brewing Coconut Porter
*Grandma really did tell me this story, and perhaps what was most amusing was that as I was laughing my ass off, she made sure to tell me, "I don't know why you're laughing. I'm not telling you a joke, I'm just telling you what happens."