The soonest a repairman can come out is one week. One agonizing week. So like any man with
It turns out the end result actually worked. So I thought I'd share it with you all today.
What you need:
1. A fan ($15)
2. Copper refrigerator tubing ($10)
3. Rubber or vinyl tubing ($5)
4. Zip ties ($1)
5. Small hose clamps ($2)
6. (Optional) Submersible water pump ($15)
7. (Optional) Your favorite craft beer (no cost - come on, you should already have this)
Step One: Crack open a beer. Not only will you preemptively cool down, but the more you drink your beer, the more you'll think this is a brilliant idea.
Step Two: Zip tie the copper refrigerant tubing in a circle around the front of the fan, and then cut off the ends of the zip ties.
Step Three: Using hose clamps, tie the vinyl or rubber tubing to each end of the copper piping.
Step Four: Get one container and fill it with ice water (B). For that truly "I'm poor" look, I like using a milk jug. Get another container and let it serve as your drain (A).
Now, treating it like a beer bong or like you're siphoning gas out of your asshole neighbor's truck (Or, I guess if you want to get all scientific, Bernoulli's equation), suck on the drain end (A) until cold water starts flowing into the copper tubing. It'll get trapped in there, and since the copper retains the water's coldness, the fan will blow cold air until the water reaches room temperature again (30 minutes or so). Once it warms up, just repeat the siphoning process to flush out the warm water into your drain, and pull more cold water into your copper coiling.
Voila! Ice cold air... So long as you're willing to act like a fully booked prostitute and suck tube hourly.
BUT WAIT. THERE'S MORE (screamed Billy Mays' reanimated corpse). Because like any
Step Five: Take a submersible fountain water pump, and hook one of the vinyl/rubber tubes (I ended up going for a bigger, thicker black tube over that small, less efficient white tube for better liquid flow... feel free to insert your own dick joke here) to the pump, which you'll put at the bottom of a cooler full of ice water. Then take the second tube, and let it drain back into your cooler.
Now when you start the pump, it'll push water in a constant icy stream through the copper tubing, then drain back into the cooler, where the process will repeat. And with the stream remaining constant, the copper piping (and the air pushed out of the fan) will be much colder.
There you go, your own
So (hopefully) now you can say something that no one's probably ever uttered before: "Reading A Beer for the Shower has taught me something." And if your AC conks out on you or you're just feeling
Either way, as my favorite Canadian handyman always used to say, "If the women don't find you handsome, at least they should find you handy."
Cheers and stay classy, folks,
Bryan (and Brandon)
Beer: Sam Adams Summer Ale
Music: The Wombats