I went to the doctor again. This time they ran some tests and turned me into a human pin cushion by way of bloodwork, in which I found out that I don't have high cholesterol, mono, or thyroid issues. I also don't have the HIV, the herp, the hep, bubonic plague, ovarian cancer, or feline leukemia.
The doctor said she wasn't 100% sure what the problem was, but until some of the issues started to subside, she could prescribe me some anti-depressants to help treat the symptoms. It didn't mean I had depression (which I don't - my mood is great) but it could help me feel better quicker.
I gave a hearty "fuck you" to that, because frankly, I don't want to turn into a robot. I know anti-depressants work for some people, but I'm not taking something like that without even knowing what's wrong. Regardless, today's post isn't a miserable tale about the woes of anti-depressants. No, today I wondered... what would life be like if I was a robot?
I don't think it'd be that enjoyable. For one thing, it's hard to be discreet when you're a robot.
Also, without any emotions, it's easy to become kind of a dick.
I can't imagine I'd be very funny, either. Just imagine Brandon and I trying to bounce some jokes off of each other for an upcoming post.
So basically, even though it'd probably be a lot of fun to incinerate mankind with eye lasers and enslave the human race, I don't think I'd like to be a robot. To be honest, I'd probably make a pretty shitty one. How would you fare as a robot?
Cheers and stay classy, folks,
Bryan (and Brandon)
Music: Grizzly Bear
Beer: Flashback (Fitting, since today is Brandon's birthday. Let's all hope he spends tomorrow piecing together disjointed moments of debauchery.)