If you haven't met the candidates and seen their platforms yet, you can see Brandon connecting with minorities, or you can see Bryan laying the smack down on Big Bird, or you can see Peggy Sue the Retarded Goat giving a heartwarming speech with an eloquence and conviction that one might say rivals even that of the great Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
Before you vote, though, each candidate has prepared a closing statement.
Will you begin, Brandon?
How about you, Bryan?
Truly a terrifying thought. Lastly, Peggy Sue?
A moving and heartfelt closing statement.
There you have it, folks. So now it's up to you... who's gonna be president of A Beer for the Shower? Polls will close on Sunday night, and the winner will be announced next Monday, followed by the winner's acceptance speech and their plans for the future of the blog. So vote wisely! This is our future!
I'm sorry guys. I loved both of your speeches so much but that wonderful proclamation from Peggy Sue the Retarded Goat blew me away and I had to vote for him, it was simply wonderful! I love both of your speeches equally anyway so it would have been too tough a choice haha!
ReplyDeleteMan, that's a tough one. I don't want feces being thrown but I also like the idea of comedic tyranny. Okay, whoever can produce the most amount of puns in a minute wins. GO!
ReplyDeletePeggy Sue makes a compelling case, but as Bryan's with Y's have to stick together.
ReplyDeleteI voted for the goat and I don't care who knows!
ReplyDeleteI still think my name should be on the ballot! So not fair!
ReplyDeleteI'm heading into the voting booth and getting butt naked to cast my vote now!
Dan, Dan, he's our man, if he can't do it....well vote for the goat!
DeleteBut the way, I did much more than just vote for that goat in the voting booth! You think she was limping before, you should see her now!
DeleteI'm so sorry, but I just had to vote for Peggy Sue. Mostly because goats are such cutsie wootsie pies! Not really sure how good she'll be at actually running this blog, but who cares about details like that?! I say vote for the goat!
ReplyDeleteThis is so hard! I actually really like all of the candidates, (unlike the actual election that's happening on Tuesday.)
ReplyDeleteI might have to flip a coin. Heads it's Bryan, tails it's Brandon.
Sorry Bry- tails it is!
Well in the interests of fairness I shouldn't say how I voted, but I can see how the poll is going to go.
ReplyDeleteLooks like Peggy Sue has taken the lead. A wise woman of few words has captivated the voters.
ReplyDeleteI voted. Do you...do you need to see my ID?
ReplyDeleteA vote for Peggy Sue is a vote for womens/retards/animals rights. Anyone who doesn't vote for her doesn't respect these voter groups.
ReplyDeleteStatistical analysis shows that Peggy Sue is ahead in the polls in this precinct!
ReplyDeleteMay the best goat . . . er, candidate . . . win!
ReplyDeleteI don't like all of those fancy speeches and campaign promises. I want to vote for someone more like me. That's why I voted for Peggy Sue.
ReplyDeleteI can relate to her.
If you both lose to the goat - and I'm not making any predictions yet - where is there to go after that? I mean, what kind of effect do you think that would have on your confidence?
Do you think that ANY woman is ever going to want to be with a man who lost an election to a goat?
I voted away. That goat gave such the display. Plus I want to see Brandon lose and start throwing poo, filling up pringle cans with them works well between me and you.
ReplyDeleteSorry guys, but Peggy Sue just pulled on my heartstrings.
ReplyDeleteAs a representative of the Orthopedic Shoe Lobby, my vote is with Peggy Sue.
ReplyDeleteNever have I heard as impassioned a speech as I have with Peggy Sue. You boys gave it a decent run, but once Peggy Sue entered the race there just wasn't another option.
ReplyDeleteI think something went wrong with my vote. A hanging chad perhaps. And why wasn't I required to register to vote? No photo identification?! You are practically begging the shifty Canucks to sneak into our country to vote.
ReplyDeleteI cast my vote and it wasn't for the feckin' goat. It was for the cute one. I'll give you one more clue-he has hair.
ReplyDeleteI had to wait in line for hours to cast my vote, but cast it I did!
ReplyDeleteTHE PRESSURE!!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm curious to see if he will actually fling poo, almost won my vote with that one, buuut I'm dying to see it! ha!
ReplyDeleteI tried to write myself on the ballot, but the election process was screwed up or something. Anyway, I'm certianly not going to admit that I voted for Peggy Sue because that's in poor taste.
ReplyDeleteVote For Peggy Sue! Her mind is set on you! (This message is Baaaaaaah-cked by Peggy Sue the Retarded Goat).
Sorry guys, I went with the goat...
ReplyDeletePeggy! She can be a puppet leader, a figure head, while you two pull all the strings!
ReplyDeleteI'm officially declaring that my vote is completely for sale to the highest bidder. Cash or book reviews only!
ReplyDeleteI just couldn't pick a favorite between you, Brandon and Bryan, so I went with the goat. I am still working on using my dead aunt's name to vote for you Bryan and I have a deceased uncle that is about to cast a vote for you, Brandon. What's a little voter fraud among bloggers?
ReplyDeleteMy family has always traditionally voted Goat in the past but I really like Brandon's feces throwing policies so I had to go with Brandon.
ReplyDeleteI voted for the goat. Is this supposed to be a private ballot? Anyway, Peggy - Sue's speech just moved something inside of me and I couldn't not vote for her.
ReplyDeleteAnd she dresses so well...
You had me at "Erection Day" in your tweet and now it's just an election? Booo. But a retarded goat, that's cool and retarded happens to be one of my favourite words because I'm politically incorrect and I'm nobody's bitch.
ReplyDeleteGo Sue!
Peggy Sue. She had me a Baaaaaaaaaah.
ReplyDeleteDamn it! AT Baaaaaaah! Not a baaaaah. That's an over the shoulder boulder holder to someone with a speech impediment.
ReplyDeletePeggy Sue. I'm really sorry guys. I guess I'll have to go get a hasmat suit so I won't have feces thrown at me... or maybe I'll just hide since ruling something with an iron fist is a bit terrifying and its hard to throw feces at somebody when you don't know where they are (I assume so; I've never thrown feces at anyone). Her speech though... It brought tears to my eyes. Or rather, it brought tears to my "face holes".
ReplyDeleteI'm voting for a "write-in" candidate:
ReplyDeleteSAMUEL ADAMS.
He's an American patriot AND a beer.
You can't beat that!
~ D-FensDogg
'Loyal American Underground'
Now THAT sounds like a good idea!
DeleteVoted! I had to wait until I was home from work. Damn restrictions. I voted for who will, uhh, benefit me the most.
ReplyDeleteWell, glad to see I was in the majority voting for Peggy Sue ;)
ReplyDeleteI think "Vote for me or I'll throw feces!" is the winning campaign slogan, however.
Peggy sue has a commanding lead
ReplyDeleteGood luck to all of the candidates, but I'm pretty sure we all know who's winning this election! :)
ReplyDeleteIf only Peggy Sue was running for President of the United States...
ReplyDeleteI love both you guys...but Peggy Sue has a song...
ReplyDeleteI was going to vote for Bryan, because nothing says Presidential like fondling a cigar, but Peggy Sue just touched me so much.
ReplyDeletein any case there will be an after party right?
ReplyDeleteUnhealthy Julia Roberts obsession? Well, that changes everything!
ReplyDeleteI predict a landslide in favor of Peggy Sue! Chin up guys!
ReplyDeletePEGGY 2012.
ReplyDeleteSorry guys. I voted for Peggy Sue, because she seems so much more diverse. Lol. Look at it this way, you can always sue for a recount.
ReplyDeleteI've been busy with midterms lately and super-behind on reading blogs, so when I saw this election post I got really worried that I might have missed it!
ReplyDeleteThank goodness the election lasts a week. Every vote counts; this shizz in important, yo!
Oh man... I missed the vote because I was travelling around Thailand. Feel sorry for me, m'kay?? :D
ReplyDelete