Monday, September 24, 2012

Blog Decision 2012


Today we have some awesome news, and no, it's not another book release. We are officially turning A Beer for the Shower into a big, heartless corporation in the hopes of cutting corners, saving time, and above all, selling out.
But before we start looking for sweatshops and 7 year old Vietnamese children that have a mild proficiency in MSPaint, we need a president. See, there's two of us, and a corporation can't have 2 presidents. No, that's stupid. We've done no research whatsoever, but we're both pretty sure no company's ever done that before. So today we're starting our individual campaigns for President of the Blog, and we're letting YOU vote in November.
  Admittedly, it's made the friendship a little rocky, but we're both willing to do whatever it takes to become YOUR president.











An hour later...















So stay tuned for some more campaigning, and we'll see you come election time in November. No really, there will be a poll and everything. So vote wisely... but more importantly, just vote.

Cheers and stay classy, friends,
Brandon and Bryan

Music: School of Seven Bells
Beer: Zywiec

58 comments:

  1. as long as there is a sex scandal with someone named deep throat and contraception is not allowed...i'm in.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nice mud slingin' so far. Now one of you guys needs to get it on with that TV reporter. She's got a nice rack!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Can we write in a candidate because at this point I'm thinking the swordfish on the wall of your bar pictures could get a hefty percentage.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I can be bought. That's all I'm saying.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Yes, I'm a fucktard, but I'm a fucktard for sale. You want my vote you gotta pay me. Minimum amount accepted is 1,000 Euro's (I'd put that in dollars, but the dollar is weak right now). Untraceable, non sequential bills. We'll just say I'm a lobbyist, no one needs to know the truth.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hey, wait a sec. Perhaps you need a president who isn't already too invested in the Blog. Someone external, who can make all the tough decisions and come at the Blog with a fresh perspective.

    Vote Addman 2012 for President Of A Beer For The Shower!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Obama kicked in a door and did a bajillion pushups. I need something wacky and off the wall to get my vote!

    ReplyDelete
  8. ahah buying votes of people who can't even go online that's when I lul'd the most xD

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hmmm, I'll need to hear each of your wives speak and have your nearly brain dead and completely useless running mates debate before I'm able to make an informed decision. Also, which of you do I think I can sit down and have a beer with, because that's apparently an important quality in a president...of a blog, president of a blog.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I would like to see an interview conducted by Fox News and The Huffington Post before making my final decision.

    ReplyDelete
  11. The cat can be bought, but his vote comes at a steep price, can't be bought with baking soda haha

    ReplyDelete
  12. I have to say, this election is 10x more exciting than the presidential election so far so I think I will just pay attention to y'all now.

    P.S. my vote can be bought as well ;).

    ReplyDelete
  13. You gotta spend money if you wanna sell out! Buy your votes from those of us with our hands greedily outstretched before you!

    Or, to settle this dispute, bring in a 3rd party to be president. Like me for instance. I'm fearless and honest....the 2 best qualities you could ask for from a president.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I'm looking forward to the campaigns because I know we're in for a very good time. Although I think you can become a company that is run by a board of directors and doesn't have a president, or you can both be junior vice presidents, and equal one president. But to really solve the problem one of you can be the president, and the other can be El Presidente. Which just sounds cooler so you'll just fight over that.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I will comment on this as soon as I finish developing my persona as an anonymous troll.

    ReplyDelete
  16. We need interviews with, and cookie recipes from, the wives. Because if you don't have a wife to cough up a cookie recipe, how will we ever know who to vote for? I don't care if the wife is imaginary, inflatable or rented for the duration, I want the cookie recipes.

    ReplyDelete
  17. I have a paypal account; I'm just sayin'

    ReplyDelete
  18. Tough decision...I'm kinda leaning towards writing in another candidate. The wife! I'll vote for the Wife that's ADHD Hitler - http://www.abeerfortheshower.com/2012/01/my-wife-is-adhd-hitler.html

    ReplyDelete
  19. I loved the percentage flip story. You atleast got math right. I could talk to a chair as well for a fee and before all that I need to see your birth certificate.
    My price
    Legitimate vote - 50
    Others -25 and if you order 10 you will get discount as well

    ReplyDelete
  20. How about one of you is the President and the other is the Prime Minister? Think about it, it sounds pretty cool... "The Prime Minister of Beer"... I'm pretty sure we have one of these here in Canada.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Well, I heard some rumors from some guys at some place that one of you is an immigrant. I'll require both your birth certificates, please.

    Also, I guess in order to prove that I'm not a fucktard, I have to vote for Bryan? Man, I can't argue that logic.

    Bah, in order to make a decision I'll have to wait until the debates.

    ReplyDelete
  22. This is a great time to vote 3rd party.

    The goat! I'm voting for the goat... with the shoe.... You know: The goat!

    Goat for Blog President 2012!

    ReplyDelete
  23. As a fellow Brandon, I am leaning toward voting for my namesake.

    But as an internet fucktard, I may just forget to vote. YAAAAAY 47%!

    ReplyDelete
  24. Casting my vote for WorkingDan....

    ReplyDelete
  25. No, see, Bryan, you have to make sure you specify that that 47% remark was not part of your campaign but how you -really- feel. At any rate, it can't be held against you because it wasn't in your campaign.
    I vote for Gir. Or Brain.

    ReplyDelete
  26. I hope I'm in the 53%, my vote is for sale!

    ReplyDelete
  27. If neither of you guys cough up some $ for my vote, I am giving it to the goat!

    ReplyDelete
  28. HAHAHA. I tried getting a grasp on all the issues. Admittedly, I was overwhelmed. November will sure be interesting. As for you guys, I can be persuaded by cupcakes and Jack Daniels.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Okay, I made the HUGE mistake of reading this out in the hall at school while waiting for one of my classes. It was all I could do not to bust out laughing, thereby disturbing my fellow students!

    As for my vote, I'm still undecided. However, I-like everyone else in America-can be bought. I like cookies, Coca-Cola, and gummy bears. Oh, and flattery will get you everywhere. Just a friendly tip. :)

    ReplyDelete
  30. So... what will the president actually do? If there's no difference, well, that'd be a pretty accurate repre-- woah I almost got into American politics just there and I'm not even allowed to vote for pres. Tsk.

    The Romney reference in there made me laugh. Not just because of the funny reference, but because it's tru-- woah I almost got into blog politics there and I'm not even allowed to pick my subscribers. Tsk.

    ReplyDelete
  31. I'm gonna pick a party here and say I have to go with Bryan b/c his cartoon looks vaguely David Tennant-ish and I've been on a huge Dr. Who kick... and the geek vote simply can't not vote for the Doctor. Unless of course... Brandon were to mysteriously develop Dalek-esque stylings, then all bets are off ;)

    ReplyDelete
  32. Im writing in a candidate.... that retarded goat with the jacked up feet/hoofs you use from time to time.

    ReplyDelete
  33. I laughed out loud, and I've giving both of you the award for "funniest blog entry I've read today."

    Man, I'm looking forward to this election! You guys had better do some individual posts though so we can separate your identities. I dunno about the other readers, but I've kinda developed this weird image of you guys as Siamese twins joined in two places: the keyboard and the laughter gland. =P

    May the best candidate win!

    ReplyDelete
  34. Politics confuse me so I'm just going to say that I like presents and money... Just something to think about.

    ReplyDelete
  35. I'm voting for Ross Perot, sorry.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Is that news anchor with the orange hair and large cleavage running? She seems to represent more of what I'm looking for.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Gia beat me to the punch but I agree with her comment entirely.

    ReplyDelete
  38. BUT I LIKE YOU BOTH. D':
    Don't do this to me, guys.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Hmmm, who added me on facebook first....

    ReplyDelete
  40. Whoever brings a geriatric movie star who talks to furniture on board first gets my vote.

    ReplyDelete
  41. I think you need someone who already has experience being in charge and has a healthy enough ego to rule over everyone else. Someone who knows how to get their way in all things. I think my dog should be president!

    ReplyDelete
  42. You don't have to be president to be the most likeable guy in in the room. Just look at Bill!

    ReplyDelete
  43. I can be your leader...eh president...I can march!!! If not I would like to apply for the sweatshop !

    ReplyDelete
  44. Some of your commentators are as funny as your blog personaes (SP?)

    Good stuff guys.

    ReplyDelete
  45. Just don't try and kiss any babies, that is creepy.

    ReplyDelete
  46. I'd love to see your take on his airplane escape hatch comments...

    ReplyDelete
  47. Heineken...that's all I'm sayin'!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  48. I don't know...I'm going to need a little more information...or maybe beer before I vote!

    ReplyDelete
  49. Can I vote for the goat? Just wondering

    ReplyDelete
  50. Throw some money my way with a few Kahlua and cream on ice, and you have my vote.

    ReplyDelete
  51. Yeah.... what IS a blog, fellas? Hahahahaha.

    ReplyDelete
  52. What the phuckweiser?! How the hell did THIS blog bit get past me? I just now discovered it. You BEER BOYS must have posted this between my 18th and 19th beers - I took a little involuntary "nap" in between those two beers. SLEEP HAPPENS!

    Well, sure, I'll vote for one of you B BOYS. Which one of you two blokes was born in Kenya, raised by a card-carrying communist, and can show me a birth certificate that was forged by a kindergarten kid on a iPad? That's been proven to be a winning formula, and so that's the Beer Boy I want to cast my vote for! Like, why mess with success?

    But, of course, I could always be persuaded to change my vote by an offer of a free cell phone. I mean, it’s not like I’m some retard whose vote can’t be bought by the highest bidder! Hell, that would make me, like, totally un-American ‘n’ shit.

    ~ D-FensDogg
    ‘Loyal American Underground’

    ReplyDelete

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
Powered by Blogger.