Monday, February 6, 2012

Is it better to John Elway than to Brett Favre?

          If you don't get the analogy of the title, I'll explain that shortly, but this is something I thought of after watching the Super Bowl, in which the Giants gave the Patriots a jolly good ass-kicking.
          And so, while Tom Brady sobbed brokenly into a supermodel's bosom, we got to listen to a bunch of retired quarterbacks dissect the game. It's funny how the NFL works.
          See, when players are young, they win games and then they get intensive interviews, which is awesome because A) most of them can barely form a sentence and B) you throw a ball back and forth. There's really nothing to talk about.

          Brilliant commentary, Jimmy. I couldn't have said it any more coherently myself.      
          And then, when these elite athletes can no longer take any more brain rattling hits, they retire, which means they get pawned off to some Sportscenter TV show, where old NFL players go to die. Again, this is awesome, because A) they still can't form a sentence and B) you're talking about a game where people throw a ball back and forth. There's really not 2 hours worth of content here.

         Man, I'm glad he's here to tell me what happened after the game, otherwise I might have been lost!
         So, back to the original point, is it better to John Elway than to Brett Favre? Now, if you don't follow American football, John Elway was a quarterback who ended his career with 2 Super Bowl wins. He retired graciously, and is still regarded as a legend in the sport.

          Brett Favre, however... well, this guy was also a talented quarterback, but he ended his career by being traded to multiple teams, getting injured a lot, throwing an insane number of interceptions, and losing a lot of games. There was once a time you'd hear nothing but Brett Favre's name, and now... well, he's kinda faded away. It doesn't help that the most recent thing he's known for, aside from finally throwing in the towel at the tender age of 41, is texting pictures of his junk to some young girl.

Currently playing football at his retirement home

          So, I wondered today, as a writer (or perhaps in any profession) if, as Neil Young asked: "is it better to burn out or fade away?" Because even if you retire, well, it's no guarantee that you'll be remembered. You could just as much fade away into nothingness.
          So do you leave on a high note or keep riding it out? Personally, I'm not sure what I'd do. I'm lucky I'm even in a career where I can have the option of riding it out. In these times, it's just hard to find a job you actually want to DO for the rest of your life.

He can't patch up their marriage but at least he can patch up their drywall, right...?

         Hell, half the jobs we come across aren't even what we think they are.

           Thankfully, that's not much of a concern for us. I can't help but feel that Brandon and I have lucked out, having found our calling as writers. And as young writers, that leaves us to wonder if there'll eventually come a time when we've told all of our tales. If some 40 years from now, we'll be scrambling for decent story ideas.

            So until that time comes, worry not, because we have an ever-flowing number of ideas for blog entries, short stories, novels, what have you, but there may be a time when we run out of those ideas. And when that happens, well, I'm not sure what we'll do. I can't imagine a life without writing... and as much as I'd like to be a John Elway and leave like a hero, who knows, maybe both of us will be Brett Favre-ing it all the way to the retirement home.
            So what do you guys think? Be it a passion, your blog, or even your job, do you think you could do it for the rest of your life? Would you want to?

Cheers and stay classy, friends,

Beer: Goose Island Honker's Ale
Music: Steven Wilson


  1. Hahahha it IS better than twilight.

    As for what I do, hmm..not sure if I want to do what I do now forever. That's one of those scary thinking-ahead questions I prefer to ignore.

  2. I never planned on doing anything for the rest of my life...except for drinking beer. Now I'm stuck in a dead-end job, drinking beer because of it.

    Looks like I'm going to fizzle out like Favre! Man, why couldn't I have Elwayed my career as a grunt? Factory worker for life!

  3. Pretty Fly for an IT Guy..... where can I get this T-Shirt? Also, I would buy a book about that time travelling taco! That dude was awesome!

    Apart from in the future whether I'd rather burn off or fade out.... well, as you probably know from having worked in IT, burning off in this profession normally involves actually burns and lots of fire! I think I'll take the fade away!

  4. It's an easy answer. Cook. Or perhaps butchering.Sadly I don't do it for a living and unless I strike it rich somehow I can't afford to drop my regular job to do it as a career. But if I could, I would totally Favre my way out of the world

  5. Big questions! I'm still trying to figure out if this is what I want to do when I grow up! But I definitely know that I'd rather go out with a bang than be known for showing my junk to jailbait!

  6. And have you been watching Goonies cause that QB looks a lot like Sloth! Rocky Road?

  7. "Still a better love story than twilight"
    Couldn't agree with you more.

  8. First and foremost - the photo of the two football players having a good time in the background of the Interview is really tasteful. lol

    I can't stick with something more than a few months at a time - much less a whole life time. So I'm all for the quitting when it's good.

    Especially when it comes to sports.

    In other fields there's a chance you'll never fade. For example, you guys could go on for another hundred years and still be funny. In fact, maybe you'll only get funnier as time goes by... repeating yourselves and drooling is always entertaining. However, in sports failure is a sure thing if you don't know when to stop... I hate seeing that... very painful to watch!

  9. I'm going to play drums till I die and after I'm dead, I'll be cremated and have the remains placed inside my bass drum. Now doing laundry and taking the dog out for a shit, I could give that up in a heart-beat. Glad to hear you made it home safely. Heard you guys have one hell of a snowstorm up there and it's headed east towards me. I've got booze and food, so bring it on!

  10. There should probably be an Old Folks' Conference in the NFL.

    After a certain age, you get traded over there. (Automatic time outs for diaper changes!)

    That way, they don't have to tell the old dudes that they are not relevant anymore. Hell, they don't even have to tell them that the cameras aren't rolling...

  11. Exactly my sentiment about sports commentary, now I just need to convince my 3 male sport loving house mates *sigh* Pretty jealous of you guys!

    I don't think I could stay in IT forever, you can only support retarded people for so long. Would love to do something with the studycave!

  12. I would want to leave on top! Also, I like how Jimmy looks like Sloth. I was waiting for him to say, "hey you guys"!

  13. As long as you know what to do with your life, then you made an excellent decision and you are good I believe.
    I wanted to an teacher during my kindergarden days, then scientist, then psychologist, professional athelete, then astrouant, then doctor and ended up as engineer. And I love what to do now.
    Athelete - it was exhausting, early morning workouts and evening excrutiating practice, and strict diet, and having to avoid too many things in life and constant pressure from everyone saying only dumb people can excel in sports - but I gave up after some constant failures in district levels.
    Creative jobs too, I came to know that they arent my thing since I have concentration power of a poodle. I cant stick to anything for long and I slip into mini-coma very often.

  14. I sooo hope no one remembers Twilight in 40 years, but they will as they'll prob be on their 4th remake of the damn thing. A job is a job to me, I count numbers and play with other peoples money, yippeee! I'd rather stop when I have nothing left then drone on, although the well still seems plenty full. So who knows if I'll ever have too. And yeah many jobs always seem good until you do them.

  15. I want to be the Favre of Unemployment.

  16. I know that when it comes to foosball, I like to end on a high... otherwise, I spend the rest of the day moping around wondering why I didn't quit while I was ahead.

  17. Not a huge fan of the perpetuated "dumb jock" stereotype, but I agree, games with players could stand to be a little more stimulating.

  18. I'd be perfectly happy writing for the rest of my days. As it stands it pays poorly. So pooryly that it's less than a dock-worker in a third world country earns, but at least it's something.

    As far as Favre or Elway, either one is just fine as long as you don't go all Tebow on us!

  19. "I have something to say! It's better to burn out, than to fade away!" ~That Dude in Highlander Who Got His Head Chopped Off

    I'd rather go the way of Elway. Retire at the apex, then open up a chain of bad used car dealerships on the West Coast. He did it right...

    Also, did you see Aaron Rodgers as a commentator before the game? He's one of the 0.5% of NFL players who can actually articulate. Props to him.

  20. I'm in IT support but can't see myself doing that forever (it's all being offshored anyway to India). I'd love to make a living with my writing, but that's really not going to happen, so I guess I'll end up parking shopping trolleys for Tescos or something in my twilight years. Definitely not Elway.

  21. I get bored entirely too quick to do what I do for the rest of my life. However, it pays the bills, so I may do it anyway. Blogging I've come to love, it's something I can see myself continuing to do throughout life.

  22. Being from Minnesota, I'm personally happy that Favre couldn't quit football. We had a great 2009-2010 season with him! But then he should have quit. Enough is enough.

    I'm still a grad student, so I haven't even started my "real" job yet. Time will tell I guess.....

  23. It's the same over hear with our football (soccer). The 'legends' retire and end up as football commentators
    "Now that, yes, that, was undeniably a goal"
    "Very much agree with you Andy, it appears that a terrific goal was scored by the player"

    I can ever get paid to write, then I'd be quite happy doing it for the rest of my life.

  24. Your acerbic interpretation of football commentary is right up my alley haha. I like to irritate people watching sports by asking them "hey did you see that one guy take the ball to the thing and score the points?" repeatedly.

  25. To me it's a 'want to' thing. I won't care if I pass my highest moment, if I'm enjoying it I'll keep going. Now if it's something like a sport, where if I keep going not only will I lose it all, but I'll also lose my ability, just leave it.

    Also, loving how football is mentioned here. Throw real good. Finally, something I understand!

  26. I'd rather bow out in style than be a joke

  27. I have to grow old but I don't have to grow up! Having been a mom solely for the past 18 years, I have no clue what my future holds except that i'll ALWAYS be a mom. Would love to be an artist, tho.

  28. Like you two, writing.

    Unlike you two, I'm unpublished...but am currently attempting to rectify that problem.

    But my passion isn't just there though. Video games, working out, coffee (OH GOD COFFEE), literature - back when I was with my ex, my one guilty pleasure was a library nook. I had every book and magazine I/we (mostly mine, like 9.5 out of every 10 books were mine)owned just in these three awesome bookshelves and the world's most comfortable chair set in what was supposed to be the "dining room nook."

    Fuck that shit. The window behind me was perfect for letting the morning sun shine over my back, readin' every morning and drinking coffee.


    Anyway, I have more than one passion but it seems like I can't pan ANY of 'em out to actually be a supportive job. Hell, I type with an 80 wpm avg, that oughta be good for SOMETHING...

    I'll be checking out some medical transcription jobs soon though. Yer supposed to have a license for 'em, and I've been pretty royally screwed by Penn Foster online (yeah, screw those inglorious fucks), but hey I've got the skills and I'm experienced with a transcriptionists' footpedal. We'll see.

    Y'all keep doin' what you do. If there's one thing I DO know 'bout life, ya gotta live it. Think up every Joe Dirt platitude and rock it.

    Not even jokin', dawgs.

  29. I tried to read this a couple times and couldn't do it. Football make Homer go something something.

  30. careful gents, some of those people are talented athletes, and there is a solid amount of strategy to make the same set of tools produce wins.

  31. That is a better love story than Twilight and I would love to read it. And more in the time travelling taco series if you can Deus Ex him back to life. I'd like to think it's best to go out while you're on the top, with dignity. But I guess I can understand why some people hold out as long as they can, and I may possibly be one of them.

  32. I'm so bored doing nothing right now so I'd have to say no. I think changes are going to come my way this year. I need to focus on me!

  33. Both Elway and Favre had the opportunity to choose because they were set up for life, and didn’t have to work another day, if they didn’t want to. I doubt we will have that option. Personally, I’d retire today if I could and go out on a high note. (Of course first I’d have to figure out the appropriate high note, besides dropping trou in the cafeteria.)

    But I would never stop blogging… not until I can’t tap the keys or see the screen any more. And even then, I’ll have to go out on the corner and freestyle my thoughts to the passers by. Until the cops come, anyway…

  34. HaHaHahahahaha! This was great. Can't say anyone would even want to see an author's junk, although if it was posted, I'd peek. Guess I'll refer to Mr. King on one author not ready to bow out.

  35. I never realised that there was only an hour of play in the superbowl, the thing takes forever...ok not as bad as cricket but still there were so many breaks

  36. That's a good question. I don't think I could ever stop writing or fucking. Those are my two favorite things.

  37. So many comments...first as a chick I wish you mentioned the dude texting his junk sooner. I was starting to fade with all the football talk. And including a link to said photos would have been nice too...just sayin.'

    However, you had me at quadriplegic Japanese prostitute... And any reference to Neil Young gains you major points in my book.

    I have done the 9-5 working for Fuckles the Clown sitting at some cube trying not to off myself on a daily basis and can't do it anymore. So if I can't make a living off of my writing, photography and private practice I may have to set myself on fire just like your quad Japanese chick. Just throw me on a skateboard and push me around so dudes can have their way with me.

  38. Neither. I don't want to burn out OR fade away. I want to go out in a spectacular explosion of ridiculousness where I load my car up with all of the shit I've written, then set it on fire and drive it off a cliff, calculating it so that I become airborne when the flames reach the gas tank, turning the entire mess into a free-falling inferno.

    (I'd blame the inanity of this comment on my lack of sleep but I probably would have said something equally fucked up even if I were not a zombie right now.)

  39. The pre-game analysis by ex players is my favorite thing in the world. Them struggling after a half hour and then trying to insult each other with things that aren't even jokes ("If they play ugly, like Tim's suit. Wakka wakka!") and knowing that at 35 they have the brain of an 85 year old with alzheimer's delights this nerd to no end. I had to drink gallons upon gallons of whiskey to make my brain shrivel up and die, you just got hit in the head repeatedly by a 400 lb. rapist. I also love when they make the players say the name of their college, that's when you get a real sense of who the true mongoloids are.
    Fade away. Unless I can go out in an explosion of dick pics. Like I'm horrifically bored with what I'm doing so I just email pics of Ray J's dingus to the entire internet with my name on it (not my own, that would just be sad).

    Oh, and I recommend amending your bio, it still states you're in Chicago.

  40. What they pass balls in football? what is this madness.

    I finished your book btw. Very entertaining read :) Write another and I'll buy it haha

  41. This cracked me up.

    And I don't even watch football.

    I immediately thought of There's Something About Mary when I saw Brett Favre. Ben Stiller is sobbing saying something like, "But I thought you were with Brett Fav-re," to Cameron Diaz. Ha. Great movie.

  42. I think your quarterback is related to that sexy goat that pops up here every now and then.

    I think even a passion becomes a day job after a while, but I would love the opportunity to be proved wrong.

  43. What in the hell happened to your agent's hands!?!
    Not the point.
    I think it's okay to milk your career for all its worth, even if it means going to extreme or pathetic, or extremely pathetic measures, like getting your own reality show. People will forget the mistakes you've made, and remember only what made you great. Take O.J Simpson, for example. He killed just to remain in the spotlight. No one remembers this but me.
    Also, what the hell happened to your agent's hands!?!

  44. I'd say you better burn out. See, I think if you drag it out too long, your previous glory vanishes. Look at Stephen King.

  45. Said so well in "Highlander" as well, you got to leave the good looking corpse, Hendrix at 60!

  46. If I could find a way to sit at home and play computer games for the rest of my life and make a decent living from that I'd be pretty happy.

  47. Firstly, Love the way you both expect to keep your hair.
    As for what I hope to continue doing into retirement..having fun. At the moment, that involves painting and writing. Who knows what new adventures the next few decades will bring.
    “Lizard Happy”

  48. Either way there's going to be questions. If you end on a high, you'll always wonder if you could have done it again. If you end on a low, you'll always wonder what you could have done to make it better. Personally, I would rather Elway it. I Do Not want to retire from banking though. I want to run in one day, jump up and down on the lobby chairs, and chuck my stress ball at the big cheese in the office while proclaiming my freedom. The sooner the better.

  49. hey you guys!!!!

    heh nice pic of ya two at the bar too. could have made a funnier face though.

  50. Aaah, American football - something about which I have absolutely no idea, except that I wish you guys didn't call it football because it's confusing for the rest of the world ;)

    As to whether it's better to burn out or fade out, I think it comes down to if you enjoy what you're doing or not. If you love what you're doing,like writing for example, then it doesn't matter if you even fade out with it, because you spent your life doing something you really enjoy. But if it's something you absolutely hate doing, it would be awful to fade out doing something awful.

    Personally, I love reading about research in science and stuff, especially biology. So I wouldn't mind one bit if I spent the rest of my life doing that, and doing other interesting things like writing poetry, even if I never become famous for it.

  51. In general, I'm for the burn out. I don't know, though, if this is a question writers have to face so much. I mean, Asimov was still burning pretty brightly when he died. Eddings, though... well, he started fading out right after the Belgariad, but people (other people) were still loving his stuff right up to the end. And, well, even though I haven't read a Piers Anthony novel in 20 years, I see that a new Xanth novel came out not too long ago. I don't know if he's still burning or in a long fade, though...

  52. I find it strange that people will always remember Farve for texting photos of l'il Farve to that female employee but no one seems to recall that he was horribly addicted to pain pills.

  53. All I can think of is the goonies when I look at the first few pictures. Then I laugh until I pee.

  54. I'm always in favor of going out on a high note. I generally think of Kurt Warner though, not Elway. This could be because he's like 430940u;2 times more handsome than ol' Mr. Ed-esque, John Elway. If it weren't for that whole religion thing, he'd pretty much be the perfect man.

    Favre...well, he's a joke and that's kind of sad actually. He won't be remembered for being a phenomenal athlete and team leader, he'll be remembered for texting pictures of his not-so-impressive wang (I can't believe I saw it! Eep!)to some chick. It's a shame that he tarnished his memory that way. It just goes to show, you can't text a photo of your inadequate wang and expect people to remember all the cool stuff you did before that. We remember the wang. Just the wang. *shudder*

  55. Lurline and Jethro....I think I saw them at the Waffle House in Virginia this weekend.
    I think it was near the Jerry Falwell Regional Airport.
    No planes required. Prospective passengers just wait around for the Rapture to whisk them away to Raleigh, Knoxville, or Rocky Mount.

  56. In my opinion, it all comes down to fame or money. Do you want to be remembered as someone great, or live your life with the ability to blow your nose with dollar bills?

  57. The best sports interview I ever saw was for the World's Strongest Man.

    The interviewer asked the contestant if he had any strategy for winning the round, and without a hint of irony the contestant replied:

    'Lift more than the other guy.'

  58. I'm always of the opinion that you should leave on a high note. I guess I kind of have that "quit while you're ahead" mentality. Brett Favre... eh. I'd rather people remember all the good stuff.

  59. If it's something I love doing, I'd be glad to fade away. I wouldn't want to reach the top of my profession, quit and then try and find something just as appealing to do with the rest of my life. I'm happy to risk Favre-ity.

  60. I will write my blog for forever.....
    I love doing it....
    And yes a day will come when I too run out of ideas.....
    But that's what plagiarism is for!!!

  61. I've been a Favre guy forever, but I can't defend him anymore. I can't defend the godawful interception he threw against the Giants, or his year with the Jets, or sexting the slutty intern, or the godawful interception against the Saints. But the retirement thing? I let that slide. John Elway was lucky; he got to leave the game on his own terms. Brett Favre was better (and healthier) at 40 than most QB's are at 30. And teams kept begging him to come back. And he kept getting *this close* to another Super Bowl. It's hard to walk away from that, but I'm glad he finally did--one year too late, of course.

    All that said, I laughed out loud at that pic!

    Would I quit doing what I loved if I could ride off into the sunset like ol' no. 7? I'd like to try it, but I'm guessing my passion for whatever it is I'm good at (writing? jury's still out on that) would suck me back in and I'd keep at it even though I'm no longer any good and I'm flushing my reputation down the toilet.

    I just defended Brett Favre again...didn't i?

  62. I read your E-book and I have to say,you guys are among the best comedy writers I know.
    I'm certain that with the right people in the mix, something will come of your effort.
    I would suggest you don't limit your work to novels and short stories>you could quite easily right for stage and film. Just saying.

  63. I don't think I can imagine myself doing anything for the rest of my life. To be honest I am a person who needs to get a change of scenery every few years, be it changing cities, or jobs, or a complete career overhaul.

    I have wanted to say I am currently reading your ebook, and I have found it very amusing! It is totally random, and very funny! Hell i even went and got an ebook reader to read the thing properly!!!

  64. as long as you don't looks like Quasimodo, I think you'll be fine.

    Honestly, it's 6 to 1 half a dozen or whatever the senseless phrase is.

    You either work your ass off and make money in the trenches (Brett Favre) or retire and make your money looking like a stone cold silver fox. Glory or Brandy in a Suit?