Most people who read this blog already know that I live in a pretty white-bread area. Suburbia, if you will. But it wasn't until I got this little gem in the mail yesterday that I realized how truly yuppie this place is.
Yes, that's right, life is too short to waste your valuable time cleaning up your own messes. I mean, why would you sweep your own floors and take out your own trash when you can have immigrants do it for you? Time is precious. Well, not the immigrants' time... that's valued at about $7.95 an hour.
And so, because of this, I have decided today's post is going to be about something I call...
"White People Problems."
AKA the problems that only yuppie white people could ever have, which are very different from the normal problems that you or I have. So we here at A Beer for the Shower are going to help you differentiate between real problems and White People Problems. For example, going off of that flyer...
But these don't just extend to the hardships of cleaning ones own property.
These also go far beyond the troubles of getting a loaner without full upgrades. No, they also affect our jobs.
I mean, really, have you guys seen the cost of Vitamin C these days? Highway robbery.
Lastly, these suburban problems can also reach the children.
And yes, if you're wondering, I've heard the car loaner and the job one first hand, which incited some very heavy eye rolling. So I have to ask, have any of you heard any white people problems? Or do you have white people problems of your own? We won't judge. I'd kill for $100k a year and a black tar heroin baby.
Stay classy, friends,
Beer: Dos Equis Amber
Music: The Boxer Rebellion