This week my bachelor pad officially became a cohabitated area. And no, that doesn’t mean I finally allowed the yowling, amorous alley cats to take over my apartment and use the place like a feline flophouse. No, as it so happens, the fiancé and I have finally moved in together, and it’s a good thing. Good for her because she no longer has to dodge bullets in the South Side ghetto (seriously), and good for me because now I never have to cook, clean, or darn my own socks ever again. Just kidding, ladies…I’m fully capable of buying new socks.
So, with the little lady having settled in, we spent the weekend cleaning the place up. And despite the suitcases still stacked in the living room like towering Samsonite sculptures, our apartment is so clean it looks like it was attacked by Mr. Clean on a speed bender.
In the process of making this place suitably habitable for a lady, I decided to let go of a few of my old “immature” bachelor items that have been with me since college…
Well, much like a supermodel (or an Olsen twin), I survived the great purging. In the end, my place looks a lot nicer now. And even though that homemade stripper pole really did bring together the room, I guess I do feel slightly more growed-up.
Cheers,
-brandon
Beer: Sofie (Goose Island)
Music: Sevendust
Kenny G should got hang out with Mr. Clean now.
ReplyDeleteoh sally sux a lot
ReplyDeleteSo long Sally. No, but really, you stowed her away somewhere didn't you?
ReplyDeletenice cans on Sally
ReplyDeleteHA! That was great! I loved the blow up doll. You should have locked that in the closet along with Kenny.
ReplyDeletewow sally is very flexible :b
ReplyDeletehahaha great comic
ReplyDeleteKenny G is a God to most Black folks all around the globe! BEST JERRY CURL EVER!
ReplyDeleteYou know you're a real adult when you get rid of your Sally Sux Alot doll. I'm so proud of you!
ReplyDeletei dont get the references.
ReplyDeleteand feels good to listen to sevendust with clint lowery back
Poor Kenny...oh well...he deserves it! There are certainly adjustments that need to be made when a woman lives with you...I find the most difficult place to get used to sharing is the bathroom. We have a lot of shit and need is accessible.
ReplyDeleteSo thats where Kenny G has been this entire time...
ReplyDeleteI wish I could steal your sense of humor and forever imprison it in my pocket.
ReplyDeleteBut then I'd be depriving the world of your amazingness.
And that's not cool.
So I won't.
But still...
Aw, and I thought stripper poles really added that "feminine" touch to every living room!
ReplyDeleteaww poor kenny G! :p
ReplyDeleteYou know Kenny is a lying bastard when he grunts "Mmmmm-hmmmmm" It's on your head when his """music""" turns someone murderous. I'm sure your lady would have been willing to sacrifice the closet space to keep him loc....hahahah! Nevermind! No woman is going to sacrifice closet space!!
ReplyDeleteWell, hey, congrats! Not having to dodge bullets is a good thing. So is going out for dinner.
ReplyDeleteKenny and Sally were probably getting it on Marvin Gaye style while you were out anyway. You're better off with them gone.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you got rid of Kenny G...or released him back into the wild. Of all the things hidden in a closet that would scare me the most.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad that she moved in with you. Although why you had Kenny in your closet makes me kind of suspicious you aren't telling your fiance the whole truth in what you do with your "Sally sux a lot..."
ReplyDeletehttp://theadorkableditzmissteps.blogspot.com/
LOL Kenny G was trapped in the closet
ReplyDeleteI'll take Sally off your hands.
ReplyDeleteOkay, that furry creature must be the cutest thing ever.
ReplyDeleteAnd congrats on getting her to move in! Basically, your fiance moving in increases the chances of you getting laid by like, 165.57%.
So again, congrats. ;)
I've got dibs on Second Hand Sally ♥
ReplyDeleteRemember to come and enter Caption my Freak Photo Competition
Must be Kenny G day, havent heard of him for years (not since I tidied away the hubbys collection of CDs - sad I know but he has other qualities) and here he is in your post and on another with the latest Katy Perry Vid. OMG please no comeback
ReplyDeleteaw sally sux a lot. you were very brave to let her go... hah
ReplyDeletecongrats on getting her to move in though.
A brass pole classes up any room.
ReplyDeleteOr what could happen is that you end up having to cook for her and do all the washing up and stuff and immediately instead of a few days/weeks after the meal.
ReplyDeleteYou should've given Kenny a shot to the windpipe before you released him.
ReplyDeleteHomemade stripper pole you say? What materials was this composed of?
I wondered where Kenny G had run off to
ReplyDeletenever fun for me!
ReplyDeleteYou should have never let Kenny out, once you did he went and appeared in a Katy Perry Music video.
ReplyDeleteYou could have kept the pole. You know, for exercise... :)
ReplyDeleteFiance?
ReplyDeleteWhere are all the commitment phobes?
Well, good for you. And good for Kenny. At least someone gets a little freedom.
I want to put a stripper pole in my room hahaha. Oh I lol'd prety good at this.
ReplyDeleteI remember in my home country Kenny G was the de facto music for shopping malls, concerts (CONCERTS) and any public area with a sound system.
ReplyDeleteawww, i feel bad for gizmo... you could have at least kept him... whats gonna happen whaen you get lonely... you wont have your bff anymore!
ReplyDeletegrats man :D
ReplyDeleteJesus, you're sweet. My boyfriend hauled like everything he had ever owned in his entire life into the basement.
ReplyDeleteAnd I feel bad for gizmo too :-(
Goose Island....well played!
ReplyDeleteKenny-who? won't be able to keep that promise...
ReplyDelete