Friday, February 25, 2011

Seven Super Secrets That Will Blow Your Skull

        So as many of you know (and for those of you who are new here, welcome) this blog is co-authored by myself (Bryan) and Brandon, who was scheduled to post today, but is going out to the theatre with his fiance instead. As he is unable to post, I will be forced to fill in and most likely poke fun at him via MSPaint.
        First, I'd like to thank Christy over at Phantasos' Playground for the Versatile Blogger Award.



         Isn't is so shiny? If you haven't already, go over and visit Christy, say hello and that we sent you, and she'll give you $10 off your next oil change.
          Actually, I just made that up. Stop by, say hi anyways, and who knows, maybe she'll be nice enough to change your oil anyway.
          So in order to accept the award, you need to reveal 7 secrets about yourself. Anyone who's a fan of the blog knows that we lay just about everything about us out there on this blog, but I've managed to scour a few new gems for old friends and new friends alike, about both myself and Brandon.


1. Rather than yell at telemarketers, I'll play songs on the phone for them, using the buttons, until they hang up. Usually only takes a minute or two.

Seriously. See vid below.



2. Brandon went out to the theatre tonight with his lady, because as all straight males, he has an appreciation for fine theatre and finds way to correlate it with his life.


3. If someone gives me a hideously ugly shirt, I will force myself to wear it at least once, so I don't feel like an ungrateful asshole.


4. Brandon once went through an embarrassing Jersey Shore phase that we choose not to talk about anymore.


5. Back when I was employed, my boss was a 50's style greaser, one of my coworkers was a man that was married to two women at once (they didn't know, and still don't), and another of my coworkers was a male to female transgender--surgery and all. She's very convincing, though!



6. Brandon's fiance isn't a real person. She's actually just a broom with a bad Farrah Fawcett wig.


7. I've drawn all of these crappy MSPaint comics with nothing more than the stupid little clitoris looking mouse-nub on my laptop. They've turned out decently, so my fingerwork must be better than I thought.





So thanks again, Christy, and stay tuned for tomorrow night, when Brandon reports back here with his review of Cats the Musical.

Stay classy, friends,
Bryan

Mood: Accomplished
Beer: Home-brewed
Shower: Gonna sing Funkytown till my lungs burn out

34 comments:

  1. those nubmouse things are rediculous. Seriously, how the hell are you suppose to use them?

    Also, who are you going to pass the award onto like a particularly virulent std?

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  2. brb mastering funky town on my phone.

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  3. I'm still trying to figure out how to right click on a laptop

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  4. LOL I'm going to learn a bunch of songs on my phone so whenever a telemarketer calls me I'll play them a song!

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  5. I was laughing out loud from beginning to end! Haaaahahaha!!! You are hilarious. I'll be back, Bed & Breakfast! I mean B & B!

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  6. sweetie, we really need to get you a new cell phone. that thing is just ancient. ugh.

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  7. i love these comics. mspaint ftw

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  8. This shit is genuinely hilarious...

    rainin' bitches

    AIDS and lack of funds

    Your laptop from 1967.

    Truly great. As a reward, I am sending you a special "I'm a racist and I have sex for money," T-Shirt.

    The words are displayed in big black letters. You will wear it.

    http://arealgoodblog.blogspot.com

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  9. No.1 and No.5 but No.1 is really good and will be used.

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  10. Once again, I love the pictures.

    And I'm going to start doing that too.

    Telemarketer: Good morning, Miss. Do you have a minute?
    Me: He has no pubic hair. You can just TELL from his voice. *plays Baby by Justin Bieber.* Goodbye.

    www.lemons-dont-make-lemonade.blogspot.com

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  11. yea your artwork is decent and hilarious, i never knew about the phone sound thing

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  12. i laughed. i cried. i peed my pants.

    well, not really, but i did laugh...

    funny stuff as usual!

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  13. How long did it take for you to learn Funky Town on the phone? Whatever your answer, I enjoyed it and learning stuff about you and your bro.

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  14. LMAO. Well, looks like a career in cartooning also awaits you. ;)

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  15. I'm so gonna dedicate ten hours to playing funky town on my phone! I have a great ear....IM GONNA TRY TO PLAY 'BACK DAT ASS UP LATER'...I might break my fucking phone (or my fingers) but oh well!

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  16. I like that it was BEER:30.

    Also, I'm not particularly oil-change savvy, but if you are desperate, I'm sure I could help you find a way/place to get it done on the internet.

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  17. Once again, very nice MS paint work. I'm not as nice when it comes to ugly shirts, they'll still have the tags on months/years later.

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  18. Beer. Great post. The "Transgender Voice Surgery" ad is the topper.

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  19. You've gotten good at the MS Paint! You must be pleasing that clit!

    The Adorkable Ditz' Missteps

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  20. that was the best 7 facts I've ever seen! haha. You have a talented clit finger-ugh-nevermind...you know what I mean. Great drawings.

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  21. Ridiculously good cartoons, but you really should get a mouse - unless you want an insanely muscular hole-finger.

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  22. Funny! And I worked in a place that contained a similar assortment of odd people.

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  23. Where can I purchase the shark picture?

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  24. Ok, funkytown was seriously awesome. I wonder if I can autotune my phone, and do some Lil Wayne on it??

    I'm going to be playing with my phone all day now...

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  25. I think we've all gone through a "Jersey Shore Phase" before lol hilarious post though, glad I'm following!

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  26. Nice dude! Laughed my ass off. I'm just glad B's done with the Jersey Shore thing, was getting sick of calling him "The Stipulation"

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  27. funkytown was on point in that video, i will have to learn it and try out to telemarketer trick

    http://randomramblingggg.blogspot.com/

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  28. loving the comics - good skills with that mouse nub, I'd never have the patience or the artistic talent :)

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  29. These are really awesome, you did them all yourself? Good job! We want more :)

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  30. haha I found this because of christy, great stuff. going to learn funkytown now.

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