Monday, January 17, 2011

Have a Gay MLK Day

            Happy MLK day, everyone, or to us unemployed, Happy Why Is Everyone Off Today? Oh, Right, MLK Day, No I’m Not Racist I Just Don’t Look At My Calendar That Much, I’m Not From the South and I Vote Democrat So Back The Fuck Off… Day.
            (Which is a lot easier to just say as MLK Day)
            I’d also like to take a moment to thank the very awesome Kara Hoag for bestowing upon Brandon and I the Stylish Blog Award, which is a huge honor simply because as I sit here in my unemployment uniform, I can’t imagine why on God’s green earth she would relate ‘Stylish’ and ‘me’ in the same sentence. But regardless, thank you so much, Kara, and if you get a chance, check her out. She’s got a great blog and I’m not just saying that out of obligation.

            Apparently when accepting this award, you have to give out 3 secrets to the essence of being yourself, which kinda sounds like payback for yesterday’s post. So here goes.

1. Writing. On days that I don’t write, I’m unpleasant to be around. On days that I do write… I’m still unpleasant to be around. So maybe there’s not really a correlation here, and I’m not sure what I was originally getting at.

2. Alcohol. Whether it’s the cheap stuff or the fancy stuff, nothing helps me unwind like a good drink. I like to try everything just once. In fact, I have always wanted to try moonshine, and I don’t care if it tastes like paint thinner. It’s all about the experience. My drink of choice: Johnnie Walker Black and Coke. As the old adage goes, I like my whiskey like I like my women—12 years old and mixed up with Coke.

3. Physical activity. Some people are content to amorphously melt into the fibers of their couch, but I like to run, and lift weights, and do Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. Jiu Jitsu, btw, has a bad rap for being a ‘gay’ sport. But I ask you, what’s so ‘gay’ about wrestling with another guy, bending each other's legs in awkward positions, trying to pin him down until he submits to you?

Shit. Nevermind.

Anyways, Brandon’s still out sick today, so wish him a speedy recovery so he can get back to writing and get back to blogging, aka take a huge weight off of my shoulders.

Blogging is serious business! What’s your guys’ secret to being interesting every single day? I’m lucky if I’m interesting on a weekly basis.

Till next time,

Mood: Gay (not what it sounds like)
Beer: On hold while I enjoy the taste of my good friend Johnnie (not what it sounds like)
Shower: Much needed after a long day of grabbing dudes (...goddammit)



  1. You sir, are hilarious and yay for Brazilian Ji Jitsu! I'm Brazilian and briefly did jiu jitsu as a kid but stuck with Tae Kwon Do instead. I always felt violated and was just too young to deal with it.

    As for being interesting, I'm not. I'm female so a lot of my "readers" are probably just following me in hopes I post naked pictures. I might just start posting PG-13 ones just to increase my number of followers.

  2. There's no rule that says you gotta be into blogging every day. Now someone who has no life like me, that's another story... Love this blog.

  3. i don't care if i am interesting everyday, cuz i write for me first, cuz im all selfish like that and shit...

    but i also have the weekend to write and the week days to comment.

    oh and i am unemployed as well..

    you guys are always interesting!

    bruce johnson jadip
    stupid stuff i see and hear
    Bruce’s guy book
    the guy book
    Dreamodel Guy

  4. I've just got into the blogging scene, and I have absolutely no idea how to be interesting on a day to day basis. I think just posting random shit is often enough to be entertaining. Alcohol helps as well, haha.

  5. Award totally deserved. And to me making things up about the other person writing the blog is completely stylish. As far as keeping my blog interesting? Um...I just write about myself. I think I'm interesting?...

  6. Although, seriously? Putting a gun to a puppy's head? I better get ALL your followers if they have any empathy for dogs.

  7. Statistically there's more racial violence in the north than the south these days... oh, and good moonshine tastes like water (when it isn't fruit flavored).

  8. "I like my whiskey like I like my women—12 years old and mixed up with Coke."

    hey, me too!

    except for the whiskey part, of course. GROSS.

  9. You never really said what MLK Day is. I assume it's some sort of flag waving, tickertape parades, saluting veterans and eagle tears or something. Very patriotic.

  10. I'll make sure not to make eye contact...I hope Brandon gets better and yes blogging is serious business that only fellow bloggers understand haha.

  11. I have to admit, your blog is pretty solid. Fun to read too, not just an overwhelming wall of text. (Mine sometimes gets that way, but I like to think it's a fun-to-read wall of text.)

  12. Sigh. I got an award once too, but I was too lazy to post it and to follow the instructions for getting it - mine was 'blog with a purpose'. Now my blog is about nothing - what's purposeful about that fer crying out loud?

    There must be lots of money in being unemployed - I mean, you drink Johnny Walker Black? Come back, Brandon! I want beer! The drink of the proletariat.

    Happy dude grabbing! :)

  13. PS: It took me a while to work out what MLK day is. Americans are sooo cute.

  14. ....MLK day? and stylish....good grief but this one of my favourite blogs even when I sometimes don't understand....I'll just go back to my soldiers.

  15. Hilarious post as usual, keep it up dude :)

  16. LOL I like blogs like this just because they get my mind off college for a bit. Good post!

  17. Haha, I lol'd at your Jiu Jitzu explanation :)

  18. not only do you wear the exact same work uniform as me... but you also have the exact 3 secrets i use to blog... we should def jui jitsu together someday sweety ;)... btw, homosexuality was definitely implied by my statement

  19. I think I'll pass on the sweaty horse-play thank you.

  20. that was brilliant!
    they do say that karma's a b!tch